Even if the husband's intention was to invoke "A jug of wine, a loaf of bread, and thou," the overall pattern lacks any of the romance that would suggest precisely what is sexy about wine, bread, and thou! Wine is a holy drink, and a Dionysian delight. Bread is holy too, and of the earth, a product of agricultural toil and a baker's care. And thou? Well, thou would have to be someone special, someone with character to get drunk on and gorged with lovingly. Having little romantic vision, how can this husband be said to have any means of realizing how very deep and fulfilling the character of his beloved can be? Maybe he did mean wine, bread, and thou, but she still only saw wine and bread. No descriptions of her eyes, of her desired person. I still side with the wife: her husband could use some lessons in Ovid, courtly love, and some manner of teasing.

pinkballoon:

Maybe he did mean wine, bread, and thou... I still side with the wife: her husband could use some lessons in Ovid, courtly love, and some manner of teasing.

So true... Anyone who had the poetry, culture and romance to bring the wine and garlic bread most likely wouldn't have brought it in a box and a plastic wrapper.

Look, if the prevailing image of being a romantic were, say, to come home from work at random intervals reciting Shakespeare sonnets, I could not pull it off with any sincerity at all, and I know that. It would come off sounding most insincere and, therefore, most unromantic.

This guy gave his fiancee $60 for her birthday last year. Ok, so he was a bonehead. She asked him to be more romantic and so this year, for VD, he pulled off the "jug of wine, loaf of bread" trick, which I think is far better than anything I've ever done, and it was she who fumbled the snap.

I think the LW wants a unicorn, dammit, and a wand, and a tiara, and a white gown, and she will secretly simmer until she gets them.

Now, as for writing "wife" on the fiancee's VD card, I would just have to throw myself on the mercy of the court, or on my sword.

I think that the wife wanted "romantic" stuff that she could brag about & show off to her friends & co-workers. She said he was wonderful in every area but the romantic gifts part. I feel bad for the guy, he will never live up to her Barbie world fantasy.

I think "wife" was his way of saying he's ready for her to quit messing around, and commit to a date. Or that maybe he finally is. How long did she say they'd been together? Four years?

Garlic bread is sexy. Eating in is sexy. Spontaneous, wonderful meals together are sexy. Feeling disappointed that he was more interested in you rather than the fancy restaurant down the street: decidedly unsexy.

Romance is in the details, not the bling.

IncogNeato:

I think "wife" was his way of saying he's ready for her to quit messing around, and commit to a date. Or that maybe he finally is. How long did she say they'd been together? Four years?

I could see this being true. Especially if it saves me from having to fall on my sword!

jade:

Garlic bread is sexy. Eating in is sexy. Spontaneous, wonderful meals together are sexy. Feeling disappointed that he was more interested in you rather than the fancy restaurant down the street: decidedly unsexy.

Romance is in the details, not the bling.

I'm with you on this.

It seems that to some women, "romantic" equals cliche' and done to death. My co-workers are always so thrilled when their hubbies send them the exact same boquet of flowers every Valentine's Day. What's romantic about spending 5 seconds and way too much money on a gift, especially when you do it repeatedly?

My Valentine's Day gift was He-Man Season 2, part 1 on DVD--and as an extra, he also got me part 2, and put it in a spot where I'd find it on my own. I'm not saying it's romantic, of course, but it's something I like and won't have to be thrown away in a week.

I think the poor guy should seek another GF who has a wee bit more education and a similar sense of humour. The LW is rather materialistic.

I hate the flowers on V-Day, you are right they are just a quick and easy out. One year ex asked me if I was hinting for flowers, I quickly told him I absolutely didn't want him to send me flowers. Later I get a call from the florist - ex had decided to send me flowers but didn't know my work schedule so could I clue them in?

Got home, asked him why he sent flowers when I didn't want them. He said he knew if he spent all our money I wouldn't be ok breaking the budget to ask him to actually do something with me.

I freaking hate flowers on V-Day :P

It is cruel & inhumane. The poor flowers are chopped off & forced to die a slow dealth in water. They have been crossed bred so many times, they have lost their scent. There outa' be a law. It's just wrong. Please support your local P.A.P.A* chapter.

Hubby knows to give me potted flowers.

*People Against Plant Abuse

Let's face it;the guy's track record shows he hasn't a clue about Omar. Chances are, he just likes garlic bread and wine. They go great together. So he got something he would enjoy. The bonus is that after the bread and wine she might not want to go out to dinner. He is in a win/win situation there. He gets a present he can enjoy and he saves the price of dinner at a restaurant. What she has is a guy who does not care how she feels and can't grasp the concept that she wants frosting on her cake.

If she were Charlotte in Pride and Prejudice, she could accept this. If she is Elizabeth Bennett, she might want a little more.

I agree.. there's not much about the LW's account that makes me think he did this as a poetic move, I mean... $60 for a birthday gift. He doesn't appear thoughtful enough to convince me he was trying to be "poetic".

If there were any reason to believe otherwise, it could be viewed as charming. But... $60??? Come on.

P.S. Elizabeth Bennett... love her!

The point is that after four years, the guy should have some reasonable idea of what his girlfriend likes. If she likes sappy chocolates and flowers, then get her some sappy chocolate and flowers. If she likes 80s cartoons, get her some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles action figures. The point of getting someone a gift is to make them happy, not to foist your own tastes on them.