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Right on--Dating is for ALL People
by RML Returns
+2 Reply

eHarmony rejects gays and a lot of straight people too because it is basically looking to hook up nice Chistian white people-like any other unofficial organization of this nature it uses an "algorythm" which is another word for a set of rules and these include your income, your opinions on politics, children, religion, etc.

Of course eHarmony isnt going to call themselves the Christian Dating Site-by leaving this aspect out of their name and business correspondence they get more revenue and dont have any stigmas-but rarely will you see such a site reject people at the high rate of eHarmony-clearly the "algorythm" is designed to filter out those who are not like minded to a specific criterion.

That said, there are many dating services which are more honest about their "algorhythms" including a great many who are quite open about being religious in nature. Religion is important to many people and that is a fair qualification for a dating or marriage partner.

But eHarmony advertises to the general public and it sells LOVE. Its ads do not tell you that this LOVE must be between opposite sex members or people with similar opinions on religion, politics, etc. And THAT is the issue which people should dislike.

Face facts, dating sites make money because people desperately want to find another person to be with-be it a short time or a long time. Even geeks, fat people, poor people, and non Christians fit this description. To be rejected from a web site which claims it is looking for a match for you and to then reject you is just plain wrong. Sure, it may be harder to match you, but if this is the case eHarmony could have set up partnerships with other dating websites-why not send gay folks to a partner with this focus? Why not send others to equally appropriate sites? Instead it just outright rejects someone who is already feeling rejected.

So who wants to buy stock in Desperate&Dateless.com?

Good post
by Horus

If I were looking for a dating site, I'd never select one that rejects gays, transgendered people, etc. even though I'm straight.

I wouldn't feel right about aiding and abetting biased sexual attitudes like that...

Re: Good post
by DaNorderner

I'm so sick of all this card playing, race card, gay card, ect. Sueing eHarmony for not letting a lesbian in? To bad. If gays and lesbians want to use dating websites, don't use eHarmony, its that simple. Theres tons of other ones out there that accomodate them.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against homosexual people, I have two friends who are gay men and they are cool guys to hang out with (my girlfriend loves them as well, we double date from time to time) who are welcome at my place anytime. But, if eHarmony and other dating sites discriminate against them, start a dating website for the GLBT community, only. Do you think straight people would be offended or try to sue because they weren't allowed to use it or feel discriminated against? I doubt it. They would just move on to other dating websites.

That woman who tried to sue eHarmony is just trying to get some easy money. Unfortunetely, our country is filled with people like that of every race and sexual identity.

Re: Good post
by RML Returns

At issue is how eHarmony advertises. Their ads remain generic and target anyone who is single. Only after signing up and getting rejected do you learn their terms.

Seems to me that is false advertising. As I mentioned, eHarmony could easily have passed these people along to more appropriate sites or been straight (sorry had to be said) in their advertising.

If the lawsuit is based on sexual orientation, that is bad. However if it is based on false advertising it is legit. You give these people major personal information about yourself when you fill in the application and I imagine you give them financial data up to and including a credit card. If a company took such information from you about ANYTHING, say a lawnmower and then told you after the fact that they didnt sell lawnmowers, would you be so forgiving of their business practices?

Re: Good post
by justhinking
Its not 'aiding and abetting', its matching people up with who they want to go out with. So you're saying a straight or gay person wants to be set up with a date that they are completely wasting their time on? I have plenty of friends thank you. ITS A DATING WEBSITE FOR GOODNESS SAKES. That means going out with someone you might be interested in and they might be interested in you. Get a grip!
Re: Good post
by RML Returns

Its false advertising. They cast a wide net but only want to sell to a small group. They acquire a lot of data on individuals BEFORE telling them they wont be getting the product.

Again. If sears said they sell lawnmowers and you gave them all your stats and your VISA card info you would expect a lawnmower. If they then call and say they only sell Lawnmowers to landscapers AFTER taking all your data, I would be offended. How about you?

Good Lord.......
by Jurgis

Talk about stretching a hypothetical.

Look if Sears did that to you, then sue them for false adverstising and all your damages, if you can prove you are damaged. If you truly have been damaged, then courts will ensure you are compensated.

Same w/ E-Harmoney, she can sue them for all ehr dmages if she wants if they are committing false adverstising. Pray tell, what are her damages, loss of sleep, emotional distress? But hse can try if she wants.

Your analogy is silly. You and I both know this is not about "false adverstising," it is an alleged "discrimination suit" trying to prove a point.

Re: Good Lord.......
by RML Returns

I disagree.

She completed a detailed questionaire which provides lots and lots of personal information to Eharmony. She has absolutely no assurance of its privacy. I dont know if she provided financial data too, but she sure as hell may have.

Then comes the service. At no point in time do they tell you they wont make an effort if they dont like what they see. You are not there to see if you qualify for their service-you are there for their service-at no point does eHarmony explain that if you dont

Most companies take your data and put you out there to be selected or ignored by others-they did their part.eHarmony implies that if you provide the data for their special areas of personality and psychology that they will find you a quality match with the right kind of person based on their concepts. So YOU (the customer) agree to provide them with both a customer and a product (you are a prospect for someone else because you completed their survey).

Quite frankly all they need to do is keep you "on file". A statement saying "no matches at this time" at least says they cant find someone but will keep trying-instead, they actually are telling people they are not matchable-and the problem isnt their inability to match you but your inability to be matchable.....not a great way to be in the matchmaking business.

Re: Right on--Dating is for ALL People
by iamjdh

Huh, I am what you say E-Harmony is looking for--white, Christian and moderate. I was rejected! I must be the worst of the worst! OR, possibly, you are mistaken. For me the "qualification" process seems good. It gives them credibility. If they are not good at matching certain folks, why not say so (as they do) and leave us to other devices? After all there are many other sites by which I may meet someone.

Has anyone sued the Jewish or Iranian dating sites for not letting them look for a mate there. Match.com lets you say what you are looking for and gives you a list of "matches," but who is to say they are any good for you—it’s always, ultimately up to you.

What an ad says is not a contract. Truth in advertising has not changed that advertisers say they are the “best.” It is know as puffery. There must be an exchange of value, traditionally, to have a contract. Sure it’s annoying to go to the effort of filling out their data (done so twice) only to be told that "23% of applicants are (hard to match and we want to keep our success rate high)." Who cares if they have a bias. Everyone and every business has it's bias(s). Show me one who doesn't and I'll show you deception!

Re: Right on--Dating is for ALL People
by jonthom11702

I'm gay and have been paired off since long before all these dating sites emerged, so I'm not really an authority on the subject. But while e-Harmony's policy doesn't thrill me, I don't think their practice is worthy of a lawsuit. It's not as if their ads are showing gay couples while turning them away at their site, so I don't think the false advertising argument holds up. And though I've never used the service myself, I have seen non-white people in the ads, so I'm assuming they're not actively being kept out.

More importantly, e-Harmony does have a right to focus their efforts towards a specific group of people. I see numerous ads in the paper dating services that cater to Asians, Blacks, and gays and lesbians, so there are other options out there. In fact, anyone who feels there is a group not being represented could apply the same principles as e-Harmony and start their own company. I do understand the frustration (a good friend who is single has expressed hers on multiple occasions); but there are other options out there.

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