It is not OK to have two mommies. Or two daddies. Kids have one father and one mother. Period.

Getting a divorce is hard on kids. Filling their minds full of the garbage that it is OK to have two mommies is wrong and immoral. The child's father is a philanderer but still her father. The child needs to know that the woman her father married is a home-wrecker.

Honor thy father and thy mother. There is nothing in God's word about honoring the whore who destroyed a family. Forgiveness is mandated but forget about calling her "mommy"

I can see what the problem is...the little girl is at the dad's house and the other little kids are calling their mother "mommy". She is mimicking them, and that's all, thinking that adult women caregivers are all called MOM. The stepmother is not telling the girl to call her that.

Humanity does. Especially when you consider that there are 2,850 deities and counting: www.godchecker.com

Children can have as many parents as give time, input and resources to their upbringing and well being not just their biological parents.

What people (the parents in this case) should honor is each other and communicate with each other how to raise these children without making them pawns in their petty ego play.

And newsflash - there is no evidence presented to the particulars of why the first marriage fell apart. To be fair there are two sides of every situation. If you still want to hold someone's feet to the fire with your rather archaic misogynistic standards the Father from the that was was the "home wrecker". His choices affected two women and their children.

tonmaimas:

It is not OK to have two mommies. Or two daddies.

Your opinion but I think many will disagree with you. This is one of those things that depends on the situations. After all, there are kids with multiple parents who do quite well, and there are kids who have a single mother and father who do not. It entirely depends and there is no one right way.

tonmaimas:

Filling their minds full of the garbage that it is OK to have two mommies is wrong and immoral.

Bull. It IS perfectly fine if both mothers act in a mature and responsible fashion. I've had quite a few friends who have had great relationships with their step-parents.

tonmaimas:

The child's father is a philanderer but still her father. The child needs to know that the woman her father married is a home-wrecker.

It takes two to tango. Frankly, it really isn't any of the children's business, and they are far too young for such explanations at this time. Every story like this has her side, his side and the facts. It isn't our place to judge.

tonmaimas:

Honor thy father and thy mother. There is nothing in God's word about honoring the whore who destroyed a family.

Considering you can't prove a god exists, much less the nature of any theoretical gods that may be floating around I hardly think that "god's" word is an authority. Assuming you're talking about the Christian god, there is a lot about those who have not sinned throwing the first stone, loving your neighbor and turning the other cheek.

Besides, it is my opinion that respecting your parents' spouses is part of honoring them.

tonmaimas:

Forgiveness is mandated but forget about calling her "mommy"

If the LW truly forgave the other woman, she wouldn't be whining to DP about the titles her children have given the other woman. After all, this woman has been in the daughter's life for her entire life.

We have no idea why the marriage broke up, so calling the second wife a home-wrecker and a whore is not on.

And even if the father had had an affair, IMO anyone who tells a young child that their father is an adulterer and his second wife is a whore is putting a more adult burden on that child than any child should have to carry.

The LW is upset because her 3-year-old is calling her step-mother Mommy-this and her Mommy-that. Very naturally, she wants to be Mommy. The problem is that her child is 3 years old and using identifiers that make sense to a 3-year-old. She has no intention of hurting, upsetting or rejecting her mother: she's probably not even aware that that's possible. She'll soon be able to differentiate between 'mother' and 'step-mother'. In the meantime, Mom should possess herself with patience, and explain to her son that he doesn't have to correct his little sister: she's only 3, and a little confused, and she'll learn everyone's proper name and relationship to her as she gets older.

At the moment it sounds like her son's trying to correct his sister, not because he disapproves of her behaviour, but so that his mother won't get upset again. IMO no 7-year-old should feel so responsible for his mother's emotions that he's trying to change the behaviour of a 3-year-old. If Mom needs to vent about Dad and Step-mom for any reason, she should do it to an adult. If she needs validation as a person or a parent, she should look to other adults for it, not try to get it from a 3-year-old and a 7-year-old.

BTJMO

I once taught kindergarten students. Because they spent so much time with me - they would sometime want to call me "mommy". I would correct them and gently ask them to use my name. But children, simply call those who are "good caregiver", especially if they have not been coached, "mommy whatever" I seen it happen so many time.

As a stepmother, I insisted however that my stepchildren refrained from calling me "mommy whatever" because I knew that there mother would resent it. Actually after many years of marriage- we have all resolved our insecurities. All of our children have grown to love each mommy. It takes time. But it makes for a better life when kids don't have to choose but can just relax and enjoy life. This mother has insecurities and issues- as anyone would so brutally betrayed. However, laying a guilt trip on a small child about something so nature as calling a caregiver mommy is pretty sad. Clearly, the wounds are still fresh for this ex-wife. When they begin to heal she will see she has bigger fish to fry and focus on her children understanding that her problem with the new family is not theirs.

tonmaimas:

It is not OK to have two mommies. Or two daddies. Kids have one father and one mother. Period...There is nothing in God's word about honoring the whore who destroyed a family.

It is a never-ending source of amazement and amusement to me that some people (and by that I mean, hell-bound demons) claim to speak for what the Bibo Sez, and yet, have no clue at all what the Bibo Sez in actual fact.

In addition to all the polygamy in the Old Testament, Jesus Christ himself described the perfect, "Kingdom of Heaven marriage in Matthew 25:1 - Then the kingdom of heaven will be comparable to ten virgins, who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.

That's right, folks - the Kingdom of Heaven is ten virgin brides, and one groom.

Now, if your call such a marriage evil, then you are also calling the Kingdom of Heaven evil, too - and that is something only the foulest hell-bound demon would do.

Additionally, the Bibo Sez divorce is only permissible when the wife has committed adultery - but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. That is Jesus speaking, In Matthew 5:32.

So, the whore who destroyed this family was, in fact, the first wife, and the second wife is without fault, based on the evidence in hand.

And that is what the Bibo Sez.

Bless you.