I disagree with Prudie that telling someone they speak English well is a harmless compliment. It may be, in some circumstances, but it can also come from a place of ignorance and crude assumptions. I remember an acquaintance who told me how strange it was to see black people speaking French when she visited Paris - I asked her why, and she said something along the lines of associating French with refinement and education. Uh huh.

I must confess, I don't understand your analogy at all. That said, my feeling is that people who go looking for insults seldom come away disappointed.

Fair enough. My aquaintance is 1) ignorant of the fact that large portions of Africa are French-speaking, and 2) apparently assuming that black people are generally not refined or educated enough to speak French. That's pretty ridiculous to me. I can imagine that some of the people complimenting the letter-writer on his English are working from similar ignorance or racist assumptions - probably many are not, but I'd bet that some are. If you're expressing surprise that someone can do something, it generally would indicate that for some reason you thought they wouldn't be able to. That reason might be something harmless, or it might not.

I can relate to battling people's ridiculous assumptions on life in Africa. I'm an American married to a Johannesburg native, and when people find out my husband is African and that I've traveled to South Africa with him, they ask all kinds of inane questions: "Does he know about the Lord?" "Does his family live in a house, you know, like we do?" "Aren't you worried the tigers will eat you?" And the most recent one, my personal favorite: "Does it stink there? You know, because of all those animals?" I can hardly believe that this ignorance is sincere, but it is.

LOL, exactly!

prudie bugged me about this one as well. ppl can speak any given langugage. it's how we communicate. to think that someone who isn't a native speaker can't speak your native language as well as you do is some great thing is just sad to me.

what also bugs me is that in this day and age, ppl are still so ignorant of things. techology has brought the world to our doorstep and yet we bury our heads in our asses. seriously, ppl! get with it!

Ha! It's not too dissimilar hearing Americans' assumptions about Australia either. - do you have pet Kangaroos? - do you all live in the bush? - do you know my friend? She lives in Perth! No offence guys, but sometimes I think that the common factor in gross misunderstandings about other countries is US citizenship. Not all, or even most, of you mind, but the number of people from your fair land with no idea whatsoever about the rest of the world is just incredible at times. Note: I've met many Americans, have been to your country on a few occasions and loved it and I'm definitely not just having a pop, honest!

Prudie shows her ignorance by saying it's harmless for "someone who speaks with an accent." Everyone speaks with an accent. English native speakers come from all over the world; it's the official language of some 52 countries, and many people learn it from childhood, with a non-American accent.

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Complimenting an African (odd that the LW doesn't mention a country - is he Moroccan, Malagasy, Malawian, or Mozambican?) on his English is like complimenting a Scot on his.

I agree - it's NOT a compliment, wherever it comes from. I'm an American who lives in France, and I get constant, constant feedback on my accent and have been told repeatedly that I speak "surprisingly good French" for an American. I understand where they're coming from, but it's really tedious.

I also get asked dumb questions about life in America. A lot of people ask if it's scary to live in America, their reason is: because everyone is a gangster and owns a gun! ;) LOL.

Iio:

I also get asked dumb questions about life in America. A lot of people ask if it's scary to live in America, their reason is: because everyone is a gangster and owns a gun! ;) LOL.

When I hear comments like that, I just pop a coupla caps in they asses. Problem solved!

I always ask any Australians that I meet whether the water spins the other way in their toilets. I have to say, it's hard to get a straight answer out of you people.

;-)