Dear Prudie,

We're in our 40s, so we are so TOTALLY experienced and not like those stupid young couples who write with dumb questions like "When should we get married?" Thank heaven we're past that stage!

Anyway, on to my question: When do you think we should get married? Is waiting a week too long? Not long enough?

We're standing here at the altar, awaiting your response.

Happy, but Not About the Waiting

PS: If we hadn't waited long enough at the beginning of this letter, what about now?

My question is simply this: If she said, "No, you have to wait at least a year." Would they actually do it, because an internet advice columnist told them to? Wow, and this country can't allow gay people to marry because it might devalue heterosexual marriage? Go get married or not, but have some level of self determination.

the letter was written by "he" and not "she" . .. was he looking for permission to ask, or to refuse from asking. i think he was expecting to be told it was too soon, and planned to use this as his excuse.

this is a guy who still has poor reasoning and communication skills.

if he was looking for permission to ask, perhaps he's already brought it up and his girlfriend said it was too soon. so then he could show her the column and say "see! i told you it wasn't too soon!" and try to badger her into it.

seriously, if you have to write a total stranger and ask when it's ok to get married, then DON'T GET MARRIED you fool.

i find this extremely amusing if when in doubt DONT DO IT hmmmm although i wonder if he wants to act on impulse for the fear of being alone or is thee generally in love.....think bout that if on impulse and fear then you will be unhappy later in life because well impulse has its moments but fade fast and is being alone really that bad im young though wat would i know about love except that you need to be completely sure before jumping into something