Gettin' sold secondhand, that's how it goes playin' in a band:

Home Game for the Patriots: Dress up like Frank N. Furter, sing "Sweet Transvestite" at their wedding.

Das Schlafzimmer: Dress up like Trekkie Monster, sing "The Internet is for Porn" before girlfriend gets home.

Redneck Country: Dress up like Sam and Dave, sing "I Thank You" for kids.

Killing Floor, NC: Dress up like Elton John, sing "The Bitch is Back" when Grandma comes over.

Columbus, 1492: Dress up like Lemon Demon, sing "Word Disassociation" for would-be author.

Go Phillies!: Dress up like Britney, sing "Oops, I Did It Again" while fucking his brother.

Dallas: Dress up like Weird Al, sing "One More Minute" for soon-to-be ex.

Horndog: Dress up like Trent Reznor, sing "Closer", feel him from the inside.

Shrinking Violet: Dress up like Scott Weiland, sing "Creep." Half the man I used to be...

Baker's Dozen: Dress up like Spice Girls, sing "If You Wanna Be My Lover" for his friends.

Havoc in Hotlanta: Dress up like Ray Davies, sing "Lola". Walk like a woman, talk like a man.

'Cuse Me While I Kiss the Sky: Dress like Animaniacs, sing "Katie Kaboom" theme ditty for nutty mother-in-law.

Die Hinterland: Dress up like Pink Floyd, sing "The Wall, part 2." Leave them kids alone!

Elder Scrolls V, Please: Dress up like Nirvana, sing "I Hate Myself And Want to Die" for Eeyore boss.

Chicago: Dress up like Bill Haley, sing "See You Later, Alligator" for newly unemployed.

Bethesda Jr.: Dress up like Chili Peppers, sing "Breaking the Girl". Or Rickroll him.

Capital Wasteland: Dress up like Harry Nilsson, sing "All By Myself". Married life kicks ass.

Gettin' had, gettin' took, I tell ya folks, it's harder than it looks.

Dress up as dyslexic Billy Graham, sing "You Are Awesome in This Place, Mighty Dog!"