You live to see the day where tickling your lover = rape and false accusations of rape by angry women = "misunderstandings" best left ignored.

Oh wait...we are already here. An army of you angry women are ready to hang a man for affectionate horseplay that makes his lover laugh and yet have just about nothing to say whenever we find out that a woman has falsely accused a man of rape, except that of course she shouldn't be prosecuted and maybe she was raped anyway.

More lies from brown-eyes, with no evidence. Yawn.

Mr Bin : If a woman was running away from a tickler and was hit by a bus, would that or would that not be tantamount to murder ?

Also, if a woman was tickled while sucking the sperm from a used condom and choked to death on the rubber.

Well if the tickler was a man, he would of course be a "control freak" by definition which is Greek for "violent rapist" here at Dear Prudence. Men are not allowed to be controlling here even in play, but they should be kicked in the balls with steeltoe boots at every opportunity. That's just the right thing to do.

I sense some bitterness, here. You aren't, perhaps, writing this from your jail cell? Accused of "affectionate horseplay" in the 1st degree?

Obvisously bin you have never laughed which is sad and pathetic. Laughter does not = abuse. Having a partner control you and not listen to requests to stop is. Even in bondage there is a safe word.

My first safe word was "arrrrrrgghhhhh!". Luckily, i'm a quick study.

I actually writing this from jail. I was falsely accused or raping a girl who was made at me because I tickled her. I deserve everything I got. But when i get out of here, I'm going to get my revenge on all womenfolk by falling in love with as many women as possible and tickling them in bed for a few seconds even AFTER they laugh "stop!" That's my dastardly plan at revenge and nothing can stop it now.

thebin, you seem to be obsessed with the rape analogy and are missing the point of the letter.

The LW said that she doesn't like being tickled, it makes her feel vulnerable and out of control, and it panics her. She said very plainly in a variety of ways that it is not a pleasant experience for her and has told her boyfriend that repeatedly. Are you REALLY not able to comprehend that because she's having the involuntary response of laughing while being tickled doesn't mean she likes it?

I think she's just asking for it by laughing.

thebin, is your mating call "Coo Coo!"?

thebin:

I think she's just asking for it by laughing.

This is exactly the reason why the LW's BF keeps doing what he does. He fails to understand that just because someone is laughing when she is being tickled, doesn't mean she is enjoying it.

I am one of those people for whom tickling is, quite simply, torture. Yes, I laugh when it happens, but it is a completely involuntary and uncontrollable response. Most of the men I have dated understood this, but I had to warn two of them that 1) tickling is torture for me; and 2) I would do ANYTHING to stop someone from torturing me, including harming, even killing them.

I am not a violent person, and I don't think these two men were, by nature, inclined to be abusers, but they failed to understand the laughing thing until I sat them down and spelled it out. Neither ever attempted to tickle me again, or displayed any other abusive tendencies. However, any man who dismissed my concerns or failed to understand after I explained it and tried to tickle me again, I stopped dating immediately, because they WERE abusers - not just "potential" abusers. (And yes, I did have to hurt one to get him to stop.)

Oops! Should change that to "most of the men I have dated seriously."

Tarquin Machismo:

My first safe word was "arrrrrrgghhhhh!". Luckily, i'm a quick study.

hahahahaha