However, we have the problem that Israel's neighbors aren't afraid of it's nuclear program
Hah! you have GOT to be kidding. I suppose some miserable
Palestinian tent peasants don't fear a nuclear strike for obvious
reasons. But you really think the leaders in Amman, Cairo, Beirut and
Damascus aren't just a little fearful and thus on their best behavior
for the past 30 years? You really think the next, next door neighbors
in Tehran are carefree regarding Israel's nukes?
So... Egypt has gone nuclear because they're afraid of Israel's nukes? Oh, wait, they haven't have they? Saudi Arabia? Ditto them. But both appear to have become a lot more interested in going nuclear as Iran has gotten closer.
That's because fundamentally, Israel's program is viewed and being defensive while Iran's is viewed as being offensive. While Israel invades countries that are attacking it, it doesn't attack countries for not being Jewish. Iran on the other hand does try to stir up trouble for non-Shia countries.
If (when) Iran goes nuclear, most of the rest of the oil rich
middle East will as well. That will be because Iran is a terror
supporting threat to most of the middle East while Israel isn't.
This is your best point and there may be some truth to it. I still
say, so what. The USA and Russia and to a lesser extent, China vastly
dominate the nuclear arms race. If Saudi Arabia gets nukes they will do
exactly what Israel and Pakistan have done and what Iran will do.
Nothing. Just sleep a bit better. Amman, Cairo, etc. being on their
best behavior for 30 years is something to consider.
So you think Iran will stop sponsoring terror movements after it gets the bomb? You're sure every bomb in every 3rd world nation will be kept under lock and key by it's government? That every one of those governments will remain stable or if (when) they fall apart no non-state entity will get nukes? And you're sure that non of these governments will ever get into a war with each other through misunderstanding or whatever? Will they all drop the Palestinian issue since Israel is also a nuclear power?
Israel itself could improve things in the M.E. immensely if only it
would also remain on its best behavior. Currently it has no motivation
to do so. My guess is that you are incapable of labelling Israeli
behavior as "terrorist" (same as US behavior?) because they are the
good guys.
Israel does lots of bad things, and lots of unhelpful things. They live in a brutal, nasty part of the world and they've shown that they can be as brutal and as nasty as they need to be to stay alive. But not all brutal or nasty activities are "terrorism". Israel has an army to do it's dirty deeds, and it (at least in theory) doesn't deliberately target civilians, but they're certainly not always gentle with other people's civilians if the other side deliberately puts them in harms way.
But unfortunately most of your "Israel on it's best behavior" is likely to translate into "Israel is expected to tolerate dead or terrorized civilians", which is a non starter for any Democracy. It'd be nice if they'd do something about the settlements, but I seriously doubt that we're going to see peace in that area until it's neighbors accept it's not going away and stop blaming it for it's existence. A normal country isn't expected to tolerate this kind of thing.
But if you are willing to be objective you can see that both Israel and
the USA have performed actions which clearly fall under the dictionary
definition of terrorism, i.e. they have used military violence, not for
the purpose of expelling invaders or gaining control of new pieces of
land, but rather to instill fear in a population of people as a
means of coercion, or behavior modification. This attempt to use terror
as a behavior modifier defines 9/11 as easily as it does Israeli
incursions into Gaza and USA actions in Kosovo.
The US is global cop. That excuses a lot. IMHO the world is better off with having a cop for the same reason that a neighborhood is better off with having a cop.
Israel is dealing with a popularly supported terror movement, that also excuses a lot. Faced with acts of war against it, Israel doesn't *have* to go to war... but they can. I.e. when we the US were subjected to terrorism, our response was to go to war. If you treat them as a normal country, then if we can do it, I don't see why they shouldn't.