...would be a great name for a rock band.

Okay, maybe not so much.

LW, if you aren't confrontational but you can do passive-aggressive, I suggest bringing your mustard in packets for a while and secretly mixing laxatives, Ipecac or something nasty-tasting into the jar. ;)

In all seriousness, I suspect that this woman is using your mustard right in front of you - in spite of your initials on it - because she knows you're too shy to confront her and so she can get away with it. I've had this kind of thing happen to me.

You can do what other posters have suggested and keep your mustard in your office, since it won't go bad. Or you can just go up to the woman and politely inform her that the mustard with your initials on it is for your personal use. Make sure you do this in a public place and have a friend nearby to back you up so the mustard thief doesn't feel like she can make a scene.

Or you can take a high road and maybe also assume this person may not have noticed the initials on the jar. Who really reads a jar of mustard? It's yellow so it must be mustard and I need some and since noone has said anything, I guess it's for general office use.

At a new job, I was bringing 16 oz bottles of pepsi in and used the small post-it notes to indicate that they were mine. One day I hear our CEO coming down the hallway to my office calling my name. She walked in and apologized for drinking my pepsi as she had just noticed the bottles had my initials on it. I told her to not sweat it as I got them on sale at the local CVS but she was mortified. No harm, no foul. I also had a coffee cup with my name on it and while I was in the kitchen getting something, someone walks in, picks up my cup from the drainer and proceeds to pour themselves a cup of coffee. I teased them about using my coffee cup in front of me and couldn't they have waited until I was gone, and they laughed and apologized and said they hadn't realized that it really said anything. No harm, no foul! It's mustard, it's a cup.

LW, if this is such a big issue, just say something. You should have said something the first time it happened in front of you. You'd be amazed how our "worst case scenarios rarely come true and it's usually just a matter of "I'm sorry, I just didn't notice anything was written on it." Now all you've succeeded in doing is getting yourself in a snit, and embarrassing your colleague as she'll undoubtably think back to all the times she did it and wonder why you never said anything sooner.

thentherewere7:

Or you can take a high road and maybe also assume this person may not have noticed the initials on the jar.

True, but the real high road would be to not put your initials on it in the first place. It's a 99 cent jar of mustard that will last for weeks.

Really to complain about mustard is insane. But if she really is so concerned set up an office pool where items like mustard etc... are purchased from the pool. Otherwise let others use it with a smile!

I personally think it's kind of gross having to share your bottle of mustard with the whole office. (I don't use those bottles of ketchup on restaurant tables either--how long have they been sitting there? What little kid has stuck his finger/knife into it to get it out?). Plus, what happens they day the mustard runs out and the 'owner' doesn't have any? For me, it's also a matter of common courtesy. At my last job, people would actually take other people's frozen microwave dinners. I agree with the some of the others who suggest putting your condiments in a lunch box or bag and stick in in the back of the fridge. Let the original bottles be the sacrificial ones for the office. Maybe next time buy really spicy mustard to replace it--or when your bottles run low, put them in the door and new ones in your bag. (Don't tamper with the food, that might be illegal and get you into HR trouble).

Right, because running an office pool--for anything!--is never problematic.:-)

Look, if the "thief" wants mustard, why doesn't *she* bring some? Or make *her* sandwich at home and use her own condiments? What would make you think other people were bringing things in for your convenience, if they hand't offered? Well, I guess a few things would--egomania, self-centeredness, miserly opportunism....

It's true that mustard is cheap and no big deal and all that--but while I'd be happy to share with anyone who asked me, I have no interest in catering to selfish, entitled assholes.

But it's a moot issue for me, anyway--I go home for lunch.:-)

Spinning a Yarn:

Look, if the "thief" wants mustard, why doesn't *she* bring some?

Doesn't it seem a bit silly to have two or three jars of mustard in the fridge? But then again I would dress my sandwich up at home or bring keep those little packets with me. I do that already with honey anyhow.

Or make *her* sandwich at home and use her own condiments?

The same could be asked of the LW.

Spinning a Yarn:

What would make you think other people were bringing things in for your convenience, if they hand't offered?

It could be that the person thinks that it is her employer who is supplying the condiments. Sure the initials are on there but that assumes that other people notice the initials (some are done in tiny handwriting, only in one spot, or smear off) or that the initials are not shared by other folks or the company name.

Another thought, what if the mustard is in fact the coworkers and it is the letter writer who is mistaken? Doubt it but it would be embarrassing to get worked up over that. :p

And what if it's Obama's mustard, and it's really a plot to install an evil Kenyan mustard dictatorship!!!???

Really what it comes down to is one person is taking something from another person without permission. Sure, in an ideal world there would be harmonious mustard-sharing and equitable mustard-purchasing, but in an ideal world that bitch from across the office wouldn't be taking my goddamn mustard either.

Grow a pair and tell her to stop taking your mustard.

1. Packets instead of jars: Must you limit yourself to one at a time, or can you bring in a dozen at once so you don't have to remember every time you pack a ham sandwich? And if you bring in a dozen, it's not silly for other people to bring in a dozen little packets of their own? Where is the line-one packet, two? a jar, a case?
Is it something special about condiments, or can you help yourself to other things that belong to other people?

2. Yes, people already have mentioned that the LW could make her sandwich at home; I was suggesting that goes both ways.

3. In my jobs, it's always been pretty clear what the company provides. If there's an employer out there that doesn't care about getting credit for every sip of water, paper cup, and roll of toilet paper it provides, it hasn't been my good fortune to encounter it.

What if the mustard is the coworker's? Well, anything's possible, I suppose.

By the way, I'll never arm-wrestle my coworkers for the condiments; I've never owned a jar of mustard in my life. Or mayo! Still less ketchup. But I do love a good argument.:-)

To even care that someone is using ones mustard is insane and the sign of a selfish and greedy person. It was my understanding that GIVING was behavior that we try to encourge. I guess not in your world.

jazzguitarman:

To even care that someone is using ones mustard is insane and the sign of a selfish and greedy person. It was my understanding that GIVING was behavior that we try to encourge. I guess not in your world.

I'm not really sure to whom this is addressed, but I'll answer it anyways. This really isn't about mustard, or it's relatively insignificant price. It's about one person respecting another person's property, and by extension showing respect to that person. I'd be more than happy to let somebody use my condiments, as long as they're polite enough to ask first. And if they can't show me that common courtesy, then fuck them.

Is "giving" a behavior that one should try to encourage? Sure. But in the grand scheme of things, I'm much more concerned about giving and being given respect and equitability, rather than material things.

The part that's more concerning to me is that she is apparently so timid that she doesn't even have enough backbone to say, "Hey, do you mind?" when someone else is taking her stuff. To me that seems indicative of a confidence problem, and she may have had people walking on her all her life.

Selfish: Heck, you're entitled to your opinion--as long as you keep your mitts off my stuff.

DOAW is right on this one. It's the principle of the matter. It could be anything and price isn't the issue. If you think LW is selfish, consider how you might feel if you were the only one who ever cleaned the office refrigerator or microwave or break table. That doesn't cost anything and doesn't take much time, but people should be considerate enough to share the responsibility.

That's exactly the point: the LW is making a huge philosophical deal about somebody taking a squirt of her damn mustard. It's not a huge inconvenience or hardship to her, it just gets on her nerves. What's the worst thing that's going to happen - you need to buy a new bottle three days sooner for $1.29? This is a classic case of battle-choosing and I'd opt not to choose this one. Believe me, you will be the office laughingstock if you confront this woman over the mustard. Let it go.