I'm a male who's 5"6 and change, and there is hardly a day that goes by that it doesn't affect my life. Everything from dating to simply walking down the street is difficult, if not downright painful.

To make matters even worse, I seem to suffer from the one physical condition that people feel it is acceptable to openly mock ( Thanks Shrek! )

Woman in particular seem to think it is absolutely *hilarious* to make disparaging comments *to my face* about my height. I wonder if the same would be true if I were equally as "hilarious" about their weight. Somehow I think not.

The worst of all this, is that those times when real opportunities have presented themselves, with women or otherwise, the chip on my shoulder about being rejected and mocked so often has ruined those too.

Twenty thousand dollars and a few months of my life seem like a small price to pay to finally be "normal."

I think short males have one of the most under-recognized raw deals around. Guys don't respect you, women aren't interested in you. Women talk brazenly about how much they are looking for a tall guy in a way that they would not accept if it were a man demanding natural c-cups.

And as I said in a different post, in isn't just looks, it impacts personal development. The "Napoleon complex" people joke about is a direct result of someone feeling like they are routinely ignored or disrespected.

And there's nothing you can do, except for this horrendous surgery.

So I hope I don't sound patronizing - I'm average at 5'9" - but the riches of height are quite obvious to me, and my heart goes out to shorter men. They really get the shaft.

Indeed, my first thought was: how tall is Salaten? I know he isn't short.

I've seen stuff that says that each inch over average is worth another year of college in terms of annual salary. Surgery is cheaper than college. Seems crazy NOT to get the surgery.

I don't know, short guys have it much worse in the dating pool, but short women have a harder uphill climb in the workplace.

OP, I understand all too well. I'm 5'7" and people simply feel free to comment on just *how* short I am. And should the person saying this be wider than I am tall, I'm still not allowed to point out their girth. Nevermind that my height has nothing to do with my decisions, and their heft is usually the direct result of poor health decisions.

Height is actually the most definitive factor in determining your likely chances of attaining specific jobs.

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I remember back in the 80's the TV show 20/20 (I think) did a piece about short men and dating. They put four guys in a room behind one way glass and gave a series of women fact sheets about the men. The short guy was always ignored until the "fact sheet" said he was a PhD doctor, head of a hospital unit, making $250K a year and living in a million dollar house. Only then did women take an interest in him. That one episode taught me tons about women (or rather, my suspicions were confirmed.)

-Doughdee222

"I am a realist, not a pessimist. The real world is pessimistic by nature."

I am very sorry to hear this.

I am five feet tall and it is evident that mt oldest son is going to be shorter than average. We are trying very hard to instill confidence in him in his abilities so that when the middle school years hit he can get thru them. He is involved in gymnastics which is a fantastic sport for boys, but esp if you are smaller. It really benefits the smaller body frame. He is 10 now and is the smallest kid in his class and already starting to hear about it from his friends.

I would rather grow his confidence than his legs. A former boss of mine also had a short son and paid over $20,000 for hormoe growth therapy to gain 4 inches of height. I don't know if that is worth it either.

FWIW I was teased all thru HS and still made it out OK. Kids will always fnd something to bully about weather it's height, glasses teeth etc.

Whether you are short, bald, or missing a leg, if you are uncomfortable with your body, people will pick up on this. Low self-esteem has negative effects on dating, the office, and pretty much any area of life with social interaction.

A lot of studies have shown that shorter people earn less than their taller counterparts, but did you know that there's an even stronger correlation between height at the end of high school and salary? It would appear that self-esteem plays a much larger role in salary than how tall you are when gunning for the big promotion at work.

If you think that surgery (or a toupee or a prosthetic limb) will increase your confidence, then it may be worth the cost, but beware: if your self-esteem issues are deeper-rooted than your current height, the surgery may do more harm than good.

"That one episode taught me tons about women (or rather, my suspicions were confirmed.)"

I share your frustration with how women respond to height, but it's not fair to lay this entirely at their feet. Men treat each other differently based on height as well. I'm only average height and I'm very used to taller guys cutting in to a conversation I'm having with a woman, or ignoring me until I somehow prove my worth. And the stats around height and salary are probably also the result of men judging other men. We're really just dumb animals.

Well I am one of those short people and female to boot.

I am a 5'2" and my height has never stopped me from being able to do anything that I wanted to do. Sure I am lousy at basketball but then I never liked it anyway.

As for jobs, in 1977 I took a job at the County Hospital as a Security Officer. I was the only female on the shift and I weighed 118 lbs. The first time that we were called to the ER to tie down a violent patient, one of the older guys tried to push me aside. I didn't get upset thinking that he was trying to put me down, I just told him that I took the job to do it not watch others do it for me. It wasn't because of my size, it was the instinct to try to protect the female from a dangerous situation which was still ingrained in the older men. I am sure that there are still men around like that. I earned their respect and no-one ever did it again. I was treated no differently than the anyone else.

I have never felt that I was constantly being laughed at or ridiculed because of my height or my looks as I am also not one of the so called "beautiful people". The few who did make disparaging comments regarding me would be totally ignored. When they realized that I wouldn't let anything they said bother me they stopped, since they never got the reaction that they were looking for. I may not be tall and I may not be beautiful but I like me and when you like yourself and you are confident you will be surprised at how others see you. If you don't perceive yourself as "normal" there is a good chance that others won't either. I have found that the bottom line is that you are the only person that can give others the power to hurt you.

I, also, am one of the dreaded short ones. There's not a day that goes by that I do not resent my height (5"4' ish). I do my best to deal with it, and I've never really been the victim of too much bullying and/or condescension, but the desire to be taller never goes away. And, it's taken me quite a long time to not let my height affect my personality so much. Not to say that it still doesn't creep in, but I've had friends tell me that they don't notice my height and I've dated quite a few girls taller than me. I am generally of the school of thought that it's your personality that people respond to the most, i.e. short people do not get as many promotions because they don't have the confidence that earns them respect. But, getting over a lifetime of feeling inadequate takes a lot of effort and is not easy for many short men. For those that do, I think they have a certain psychological tendency towards confidence to begin with. Also, it's different for short attractive guys v. short unattractive guys.

There will always be assholes who discriminate on purely physical grounds, but I really think that it's the confidence that comes through. And, again, I'm not discounting how height plays a role in people's lives; it does, and I know for a fact that if I were taller I'd be a different person. If only for the lack of mental anguish that I put myelf through: everytime I meet a girl is she going to consider my height; standing in a bar feeling like a boy among men; 'I can't see the fucking stage from here!", etc.

Mostly, what bothers me is what was illustrated in a post above: that being short is one of the only openly-acceptable forms of discrimination. Not only is it common to make fun of short guys, it's often used as a perfectly acceptable comedic effect. It's quite common for women to blatantly reject a man because of his height, and think of it as a completely legitimate reason. How would these women feel if someone nonchalantly dismissed them as being too fat? I know we all have standards, and most men like thin women, but the point is that it would be widely regarded as being in extremely poor taste to vocalize this fact when considering a date. And at least fat people garner a little bit of sympathy. None for the short guy. Generally, women are much more accepting and/or not so concerned with a guys overall physicality, except when it comes to height. This is the one requirement even some of most progressive of women have. Again, not all women feel this way, but many, many do.

And to Donnamp, not to make light of your experience, but being a short woman is completely different than being a short man. And, at 5"'4' you are not all that short for a woman.

Sorry, Donnamp. I now realize that you said 5"2', but I think my point still stands.

I'm a 5' foot and spare change female, and I love short guys!! Absolutely love them. I base my dating habits more on who I click with the best in terms of interests and personality, but the only physical flaw I can point out on my recent boyfriend is he's a towering 6'... which can look pretty darn odd in photos. My preference is by far short guys. I just think you-well, look better!

So take heart, short females are around, and think of it this way-if they say they prefer taller men, well... you ARE taller! :-) This is a case in which you might benefit from, ahem, lowering your expectations of women.

Pelander.

I have a bud who is 5'3".

When he posts the exact same personal ad showing he is 5'9", he gets 3 or 4 responses. He gets no responses to the ads when he posts his actual height.

This is pre-personality and with the same text.

Probably be cause he's filtered out and not even presented.

Smart, good shape, good income too.

I recognize i've had it a lot easier.

I am a woman who is just under 5'4", so I am not really that short. I have a woman friend who is 5'11", and she has always had problems dating. One time we were in a bar and an old man said to her, "I wouldn't have dated you even when I was young." To her credit, she turned around and said to me in a loud voice, "I have just been insulted by a man with no teeth.". Some people are a**holes, and they're going to insult you about something. I think tall women have it as bad as the short guys. By the way, my husband is 5'7" on a good day. I never get the couples with the really short women and the really tall guys. Look around. There are a lot of them.

I don't think 5'1" is abnormally short for a woman. But I guess if it's that important to people, and they can afford it, we have to let them do it. But the bad part is that you may find that it wasn't your height that was holding you back, it was your intelligence and skill, or lack thereof.