Maybe it's because I'm in my last month of pregnancy and am extremely uncomfortable, but after reading this article it's making me think what's so great about having kids. After looking at some posters comments it makes kids seem like whiny, spoiled, ungrateful moochers who bring out the worse in you.

Guaranteed, your kids will be the worst and the best thing to happen to you. They are frustrating and difficult beyond belief but you all get through it, better for having survived and stronger because you had gone through it together.

What creates the difference between the perpetually bitter and the wonder parents is your own attitude. If you view the kids as an inconvience to you living your own life you will probably end up with those grown kids that have to be guilted into visiting you on holidays. Or you can see them as a job that you have to do. Do you always love your career? Unless you are a victim to the economy hopefully you have some fulfillment in your current job. Even when things are tough and you might not be enjoying yourself, there are other times when you have the satisfaction of a job well done.

You'll be fine. It's hard to see anything in a rosy light when you are carrying an additional 30 lbs in front of you and aren't able to sleep long enough to take the edge off. :)

i can only speak for myself, but my children are truly the light if my life and bring me more happiness and love than i ever thought was possible, and i was already pretty happy to start ( except with the aforementioned 40lbs in my case). there are less than rewarding days, and a lot of poop...but you will not believe the intensity of the attachment toward your children. best of luck...and labor doesn't last forever.

Interacting with my daughter is usually the best (and only occasionally the worst) part of my day. She is an independent autonomous human being with a mind of her own and that often means we have different goals (mom and dad-get to work on time, her-decorate her lego set with ribbon and tinsel). Good luck to you and stop reading the doom and gloom.

You'll be fine. Just nip the whining in the bud (you'd be AMAZED at how early they'll start testing you) and enjoy them. Poop aside, they're a lot of fun, you know.

The best gift you can give your kids is by loving them by showing them there are lines which if crossed, have consequences. Ever watch Super Nanny? I just can't get the parents that let their kids walk all over them. It's a hard job, but I love it.

the best gift you can give your children is to be a sane, happy, loving mother...everything else is just nuts and bolts.

It's not too late for that abortion, kcperlas.

what an unkind thing to say to an expectant mother. shame on you.

I'm just throwing it out there :)

Gotta say: The best gift you can ever give your children is eventual happiness. The question really comes in what the definition of happiness is. Some people don't understand that to give your children happiness you WILL have to sacrifice, be it money, free time, or (sometimes) your own loss of happiness.

Lots of parents just don't want to have to experience the emotional distress of having to talk to, explain, or punish their children. They don't want the child to "hate" them (a situation which generally only lasts for a few hours to a few days) because they have grounded the child. Such thinking is purely selfish. I would be devistated if my child hated me, but if grounding my child is what it takes to make the child learn that stealing is wrong, so as to turn them away from the path of lifelong crime, and my child hates me from the grounding for the rest of their life, I am completely prepared to make that sacrifice.

You want your children to become happy, healthy, sane members of society who will pass down your ideals and morals to their children, ensuring a better world. Every decision you make should revolve around your children. Every decision you make is about whether your children will be positively or negatively affected.

They're watching. And you're responsible.

In practice, it starts to come a little more naturally after the first 2-3 years. Discuss your child rearing goals with your significant other. Having a plan always seems to help (even if you have to divert from it from time to time).

Good luck with the new baby. :)

kcperlas:

Maybe it's because I'm in my last month of pregnancy and am extremely uncomfortable, but after reading this article it's making me think what's so great about having kids. After looking at some posters comments it makes kids seem like whiny, spoiled, ungrateful moochers who bring out the worse in you.

KC,

I've got 3 kids, and before the first thought I'd be a terrible father. I can't imagine what life would be like without them. Children are mixed joy and pain, but are really the best thing that ever happened to me. You'll do fine.

Bondsman

P.S. Be warned that for most people the first couple of months ARE bad. The kid will be waking up every couple/three hours hungry, and that means YOU are up, and your sleep will be all out of whack. After the kid sleeps 4 hours at a night though, things will be fine!