Look, obviously the stepmother is a monster - everyone can agree on that. And I agree that what the stepson has done is not good, and that there is something very wrong in this family. But it strikes me that if the genders were reversed - if we were talking about a stepfather who had seduced his 17 year old stepdaughter, and continued to screw her for several years...would people be having the same violently negative reaction towards the 17 year old in question? I think not. I think people would say she was a victim of abuse, and that any feelings of guilt she may have would be the typical misplaced guilt that abuse victims often feel, and not evidence of any wrongdoing. Maybe I'm incorrect...I just think that anyone who says this guy is a horrible asshole who reaps what he sows should ask themselves whether they would say the same thing if the genders were reversed.

Tixies are for kids.lol

Trixie, I understand and agree that, if it was the monter mans who did the stepdaughter, there would be rioting in slate.

However, it is no different for the female here to have seduced the boy kid.

Now, since she's such a bitch in all respects, I think the kid should just deny everything and use the example of her whoring around with other guys to make this out to be a lie.

So what if the kid is bullshitting.

It's better to save his dad some $$ and the pain of what really went down(on whom).

Just deny it and call her a goddamn liar.

trixie123:

Look, obviously the stepmother is a monster - everyone can agree on that. And I agree that what the stepson has done is not good, and that there is something very wrong in this family. But it strikes me that if the genders were reversed - if we were talking about a stepfather who had seduced his 17 year old stepdaughter, and continued to screw her for several years...would people be having the same violently negative reaction towards the 17 year old in question? I think not. I think people would say she was a victim of abuse, and that any feelings of guilt she may have would be the typical misplaced guilt that abuse victims often feel, and not evidence of any wrongdoing. Maybe I'm incorrect...I just think that anyone who says this guy is a horrible asshole who reaps what he sows should ask themselves whether they would say the same thing if the genders were reversed.

You are correct about the double standard. what you need to understand though is that the male in any situation like this is always in the wrong, regardless of what side of the situation he is on. Heck maybe the father is partly to blame too, because he was away on business too often and obviously could not satify her in the way that every woman deserves. The step mother is the victim in all this, because she is being judged.

USNVETERAN:

... I think the kid should just deny everything and use the example of her whoring around with other guys to make this out to be a lie. So what if the kid is bullshitting. It's better to save his dad some $$ and the pain of what really went down(on whom). Just deny it and call her a goddamn liar.

Hope the kid is a good liar, and hope like hell stepmom doesn't have pictures. We know she is a bitch, a whore, a monster, a cheater, and a liar. What we don't know is if she's stupid although this amateur extortion effort is some indication that she's no Marilyn vos Savant.

"what you need to understand though is that the male in any situation like this is always in the wrong"

What YOU need to understand is that YOU have a neurotic hatred of all men and thus are incapable of giving anyone any type of advice when it is about genders.

Crawl back under your rockette, Ms Hater of all men.

The father is to blame because he's, well, you know, male. That's the rule here in PrudieLand.

Unfortunately, not only here.

USNVETERAN:

"what you need to understand though is that the male in any situation like this is always in the wrong"

What YOU need to understand is that YOU have a neurotic hatred of all men and thus are incapable of giving anyone any type of advice when it is about genders.

Crawl back under your rockette, Ms Hater of all men.

If I could have a dollar for every incorrect assumption you made in that response......

Hear hear. Maybe it's just too hard for me to put myself in the other person's head. I have 3 daughters. If I found out that any adult twice their age had sex with them when they were 17, I'd seriously go off on the adult whoever it was, ESPECIALLY if it was my second wife. I find it hard to imagine being angry at all at my children for "deceiving" me, the blame is all to the adult. I think the LW has nothing to fear and should come clean with the dad and help him get this nasty piece of work out of both of their lives.

I don't give one damn what you think or wish you had.

You ARE a man hater, no mayyer what combinations of gender you may be.

Your initial response was petty, angry and ignorantly disgusting.

What you need to understand is that Pogue Mahone's reply was obviously tongue-in-cheek!!

USNVETERAN:

I don't give one damn what you think or wish you had.

You ARE a man hater, no mayyer what combinations of gender you may be.

Your initial response was petty, angry and ignorantly disgusting.

Because you are a vet, I will let you off the hook here.

I am a male and I was being sarchastic. The double standard I was commenting on is actually a pet peeve of mine....or at least I enjoy making fun of it because so many people on this board tend to live by it.

Bwwaaa ha ha ha ha, that's all I can say about the Pogue Mahone mixup.

As far as the double standard...I do not get all the anger at the kid here in the fray. Eesh. I can see the argument that 17 is close to adulthood, so maybe people aren't going to think of him as "underage," but she was his stepmom, she was the adult, or should have been, anyway.

On the other hand, I went to a boarding school where there were, over the years, several relationships between female students and male teachers. Slightly smaller age difference than in this case, but still. The other teachers and administration seemed appalled when they found out about it, but it seemed like a lot of people also thought that 17 and 18, these girls knew what they were up to. So who knows.

what's a 17 year old supposed to do? He's living a Penthouse Letter!

I gotta admit I have half a stiffy thinking about being 17 and having a 32 year old stepmom move in lol

USNVETERAN:

....

Now, since she's such a bitch in all respects, I think the kid should just deny everything and use the example of her whoring around with other guys to make this out to be a lie.

So what if the kid is bullshitting.

It's better to save his dad some $$ and the pain of what really went down(on whom).

Just deny it and call her a goddamn liar.

Agreed 100%. Life is too short. There is no need for the dad to know about stuff that is water under the bridge. The important thing now is that Dad not get fleeced by the bitch.