...and the culture of the individual. We're all so damn empowered these days that we're unwilling to entertain opposing viewpoints because we see disagreement as disrespect. And the the internet and niche news channels guarantee that we don't have to listen to anything we don't agree with. We've lost the knack of civil compromise.

mikestand:

...we're unwilling to entertain opposing viewpoints because we see disagreement as disrespect. And the the internet and niche news channels guarantee that we don't have to listen to anything we don't agree with. We've lost the knack of civil compromise.

I agree with that part of your post.

I think of self-esteem as self-respect, a quality that strengthens a person to behave respectfully to others. But you may disagree. Anyway, I especially agree that we've lost the knack of civil compromise.

And the the internet and niche news channels guarantee that we don't have to listen to anything we don't agree with.

is that why the democrats will try to kill talk radio using the unconstitutional fairness doctrine? rush limbaugh says stuff they don't like. poor little thangs!!

Agree with your post heartily, except for (maybe) the self esteem part. I personally see (IMO) many fellow parents emphasizing their kids' "self esteem" to the point where discipline and consequences for bad behavior is avoided to preserve the s.e. Didn't historys' tyrants have way too much of it? Or, does a truly healthy s.e. mean that one has no problem deferring to, respecting, and serving others with an attitude of humility - without feeling unappreciated? Now that definition I could live with. Peace.

bigmac:

Agree with your post heartily, except for (maybe) the self esteem part. I personally see (IMO) many fellow parents emphasizing their kids' "self esteem" to the point where discipline and consequences for bad behavior is avoided to preserve the s.e. Didn't historys' tyrants have way too much of it? Or, does a truly healthy s.e. mean that one has no problem deferring to, respecting, and serving others with an attitude of humility - without feeling unappreciated? Now that definition I could live with. Peace.

I perhaps should have said "...excess self-esteem". Of course we can live with the latter kind. I'm seeing more and more of the former unfortunately.

mikestand:

I perhaps should have said "...excess self-esteem". Of course we can live with the latter kind. I'm seeing more and more of the former unfortunately.

I've given some thought to the former kind and see it as a phony self-esteem, based partly on the pretentiousness I've seen accompany this kind. More to the point, the intolerance of dissent accompanying this kind suggests to me a fear of dissent. I've observed that when people are genuinely sure of themselves, they can listen to dissent, look for points of agreement, and compromise to get things done. When people won't tolerate dissent, they seem to think it would kill them if they did. That's plain old insecurity, IMO.

Good thread, mikestand.

It was once said that honor is self esteem put into action. I think in the last decade many individuals have confused arrogance, lack of self discipline, and Napoleon complexes with self esteem, thereby giving it a bad and underserved rep.

I agree that self esteem has more to do with being self assured and comfortable enough with one's self that they don't feel the need to attack anyone who disagrees with them, even if it is founded on sound and well thought out reasons.

I see one of the biggest contributing factors to be education systems, sporting systems, and parents that advocate that there are no winner or losers. There are important lessons to be learned from both, be it pride at a job well done, humble and honorable behavior, or that sometimes in life you just don't get to be the winner no matter how hard you try and that's ok.

Great post! Good to think on and explore something other than the politically charged name calling going on... everywhere!

So on target - I just wrote to a blogger today asking why they got so offended that someone made a post that contradicted what they had said. I really cannot believe the way some bloggers respond to anything that is other than glowing praise.

I'm offended that Mikestand and others miss the point of the piece entirely. It is not a matter of "culture" (i.e., nurture) but evolution (i.e., nature). These effects would persist (and have persisted) regardless of our cultural circumstances.

If you have not done so, do yourself the favor of reading Pinker's "The Blank Slate."