I find this sort of thing very common in the Y generation crowd. They work, their boss gets on their back or criticizes them, and they're all in tears. It's part and parcel of being babied for so many years. Yeah, I speak from experience too.

Instead of looking elsewhere, why not suck it up and stay there for at least a year, before you establish your resume' as a cut-and-run pathway...because you're always going to have people you work with that you don't get along, bosses that are difficult.

Don't make the same mistakes that I did, jumping from place to place. Grit your teeth and ask:What can this situation teach me? Also, getting "The 48 Laws of Power" by Robert Greene helps too.

I thought the same thing (although I am generation Y and have never had a problem with a job or with a boss nor have most of my friends). My first thought was- how many ways could you mess up daily when working in a pet store?

But some bosses are undoubtedly nasty. I've met people who obviously were on a power trip and enjoyed watching their employees squirm because it "showed everyone who was in charge". Thankfully I've never had to work for one. I wouldn't stay with a person like that for a day longer than absolutely necessary.

Almost none of these letters ever really give enough detail for us to know for sure, and they're all biased- that's why they're so discussable.

I'm generation in Y as well and work in an office with a dick. He's a dick to me he's a dick to all of our coworkers and especially to his assistant who does her job flawlessly. Some guys are just dicks plain and simple. He's never made me cry or or hurt my feelings but he can really work my nerves. She needs to toughen up and stand up for her self and try to develop some thicker skin.

I have to disagree. I am 40 and I worked in retail for many years for a boss who was simply unhinged. She was paranoid (thought all the women were sleeping with her husband) unpredictable (criticizing the same behaviour she had praised only the day beofre) and downright nasty. And I sucked it up and stayed for 9 years.

I've been out of that job for almost as long as I was in it now (the final straw was one night when the roads were flooded so I couldn't get home and she told me I couldn't stay in her store. After 9 years? She was just being nasty and I was finally done with it.)

LW doesn't seem to be a bad employee: she says she likes her work and is good at it. That says to me that the boss probably is a nut. For me, the red flags for gen-Y coddle syndrome are phrases like "he makes a big deal out of little things" and "unfair" and, yes, "mean," but LW doesn't seem to be whining ad saying it's unfair - she's looking for a solution. This is not the typical coddled gen-Y response. The coddled look to others to solve the problem for them - to make the boss stop being mean, rather than looking for ways that they themselves can deal with the situation.

But here's the thing: Purdence said it could affect LWs mental health. I truly believe that I stayedwith MY psycho boss because of some employment version of Stockholm Syndrome. (That sounds silly, and it is, but at the same time, I think there is something wrong when you convince yourself that inexcusable behaviour is acceptable, hence my use of Stockholm.) Over the years, I developed a truly twisted loyalty to this woman, defending her bitchiness and unpredictability, trying always to see things from her (distorted) perspective. My anxiety went through the roof, I even cut my own skin on a few occasions. I couldn't sleep, I pushed myself so hard it was ridiculous. (I once worked 4 days with no more than 7 hours off in a row and I can count on one hand the number of weekends I had off in my 9 years.) I was spiraling into crazy to gain the approval of a neurotic boss. So I would tell LW the following: Get OUT. Get a new job, give notice, and get away as fast as you can. It isn't worth it.

Justshakingmyhead - there's something to be said for toughening up, too. For me, it took leaving that crap job to toughen up. It strengthened my resolve to not be a victim of that sort of bullshit again, not by controling the situation, but rather by controling my response to it. I cried ALL the time in my retail job, and my next job was for a control freak who was almost as bad. The solution: I still busted my butt for her approval, but if I didn't get it, I recognized that I had done my best and I didn't take it personally. Sometimes it takes moving on to stimulate growth.

My first thought was- how many ways could you mess up daily when working in a pet store?

I'm picturing the LW working for Samuel L. Jackson, who's shouting at her, "I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THESE M-----F------ SNAKES IN THIS M-----F------ BIRDCAGE!"

LOL!!!

"I want these M-Fing snakes OUT of the M-F-ing birdcage!"

(Good point, Tom.)

That image is hilarious - thanks for the laugh.

I am a retail pet store manager and can tell you that there are hundreds of ways you can mess up at a pet store. The issue is, when you mess up at a pet store, something alive can end up dead. Turn on the wrong basking lights? A lizard either gets fried or his body temp drops too low and he can't digest his food. Don't feed the birds? They can be dead by the end of the day due to high metabolisims. Feed crickets that are too big to a bearded dragon? They could choke or develop paralysis. Add chlorinated water or too much of a prevenative med to a fish tank or multi tank system? Hundreds of fish are dead. Not to mention that the cost of keeping pets alive and healthy is high to start with, so improper care can be costly as well as deadly. Too many people think that working for a pet store is all about petting the bunnies. It isn't. It's a lot of hard work and you have to be intelligent about it. Also, as a retail manager I can tell you that the generation has nothing to do wih it. People of many ages THINK they are doing a great job when they simply are not. No amount of telling them gets the point across. Sometimes, you just have to be mean, especially if the mistakes this girl is making is costing a small busines owner money or a pet it's life. I can't tell you how many times I have had to tell someone "I'm not your friend, I'm your boss. You need to follow this policy to keep this pet clean, happy, and healthy." She needs to grow up a realize that there are plenty of fish in the sea and pet stores that sell them. If she truely wants to work for one, she needs to step back and look at the results of her mistakes and see if she really is cut out to be responisble for somethings life. If her mistake cost someone a lot of time or money, she can learn from it, but it takes swallowing your pride and letting your boss teach you the right way. If she killed something or put it's life in danger, then she needs to realize that her boss was well within his rights to coach her and that she should exercise her love of animals with a trip to the zoo and leave her retail paycheck up to the local gorcery store.

I know it's harsh, but as a pet store manager, it takes me at least a month to fell that a new employee can be trusted with the basics. There is just so much to learn. If you don't uphold standards and push yourself and your staff to be clean, well educated, and proactive, then you will easily slip into decline. A state of decline is simply not acceptable when you alone are responsible for a life.

Oh, and if she's putting the mother f------ snakes in a mother f----- bird cage, then she should get a mother f----- boot up her butt and a shove out the door.

I agree. Just because someone says her boss is a nut doesn't make that person a poor employee. I do agree with Prudence that it will eventually have an effect on the letter writer's mental health. I once worked for a mean-spirited, horrible man. He was loathed by all - colleagues and "minions" alike. However, he brought in money so nothing was done. It got to the point where I was so bullied I was vomiting before work each day and the amount of self-esteem and belief in my ability to do my job that I lost took me years to recover. That was nearly four years ago and it took me until just recently to start believing I was capable. This man threw a fit over the size of a paper clip. Somehow, I don't think that had anything to do with anyone's job performance.

Damn straight, pet stores are about blood and death, and if you don't have the balls to be able to handle this kind of a high-pressure line of work, you need to find some easy sissy job to fall back on, like being a paramedic or firefighter.

A-renne,can't you see the difference between stern and mean? Of course when you're the boss, you have to be boss and not necessarily friend, you have to make sure the job is done efficiently, effectively and safely, etc. Butthat does not give you (not YOU, but a boss) the right to belittle, berate and bully. There is a big difference between what you describe and beinga jerk.

Bortimus, though funny, that's not fair. I had a kid work for me once who couldn't cut it as a deli worker. Sweet kid, good work ethic,and learning disabled to thepoint where she couldn't subtract .30 from 1.30 without a pencil and paper - and then she still might get it wrong. Just because you think something is easy doesn't mean it's easy for everyone. I'm certain that there are people who simply don't have what it takes to work in a pet store. And it might not be because they are lazy or stupid or whiney - they just might have the abilities in the areas that are required.

justshakingmyhead:

I'm generation in Y as well and work in an office with a dick. He's a dick to me he's a dick to all of our coworkers and especially to his assistant who does her job flawlessly. Some guys are just dicks plain and simple. He's never made me cry or or hurt my feelings but he can really work my nerves. She needs to toughen up and stand up for her self and try to develop some thicker skin.

If the guy's that way to everyone, she should just go. Or, if it's a corporation, complain to whoever is next in the chain of command. However, the fact that he makes her cry implies to me that she's just never had anyone express disapproval to her before.

"Janie, that's a very creative way you added these numbers. You didn't get the answer I was looking for, but you showed real initiative in coming up with a process you hadn't tried before," just doesn't cut it in the real world. "Janie, your register was $27 short. Who's going to make up the difference?" is more what she'd likely hear. Or if the cats get dog chow and vice versa, or she overfeeds and kills the fish, or the animals' water bowls are empty when he comes in each morning, he might have a reason for being critical.

IncogNeato, my boss made me cry all the time. It was because she was a bitch. I'm pretty tough,but it wasn't being hurt or sad - it was sheer frustration.