The person who is passing himself as a "teacher" when he is not, and her better half not liking it is a clear sign of how ANAL the academic situation is.

In academics, title is everything. In a business, it is work that matters. In academics, it is the title that matters. I have had professors correct me when I called them as Mr. XYZ, and they would say "It is Dr. XYZ" before continuing the discussion.

Forget those wussies.......

If they aren't at work, the PhDs are never to be referred to as Doctor. Only physicians are entitled to that form of address on a casual basis.

He is teaching classes. That makes him a teacher, regardless of whatever else he does. The LW didn't say that her husband is claiming to be a full or even associate professor, he is claiming to be "teaching at college-X".

He is not a "teaching assistant" he is a teacher.

There is no lie here. There may be a bit of dodging the full truth, but what they don't know won't hurt them.

Making up or requiring the use of some title is pretentious no matter where or what you are (including academics). Correcting someone when they don't reveal the full truth of any matter is a bit anal if you ask me.

The physicians and dentists among my friends really hate being called "doctor" outside of work. It sounds pretentious even to them. One told me he expects to be asked to produce a little black bag if someone calls him that.

The army guys I used to hang out with never used titles, either, but part of that might have been because the officers were fraternizing with enlisted types. Not supposed to do that, but we didn't ask and didn't tell.

TB or not TB.

Isn't that the question?

Wrong! Many PhD's demand their title be used outside of 'work'. They put in the work, they earned the honorific.

Chiks:

In academics, title is everything. In a business, it is work that matters. In academics, it is the title that matters. I have had professors correct me when I called them as Mr. XYZ, and they would say "It is Dr. XYZ" before continuing the discussion.

And how do you think those titles are earned? (Hint: you have to work for them).

MessyONE:

If they aren't at work, the PhDs are never to be referred to as Doctor. Only physicians are entitled to that form of address on a casual basis.

That hasn't been my experience, actually. My father's always used the title doctor.

Personally, people are going to call me by my first name in most non-work situations, so it's hard to say... but I definitely use it on any sort of paperwork.

According to the etiquette books (and several centuries of tradition), Ph.D.s are to use letters after their names in correspondence, as in Jane Smith, Ph.D. If she were a physician, it would be Dr. Jane Smith. Therefore, a clinical psychologist like my friend can only use "Dr." while she's treating patients and her correspondence doesn't use that title.

I have no idea how it all started, but physicians take this very seriously.

Interesting. Well, perhaps that tradition isn't adhered to quite as strictly anymore, since Dr. Martin Luther King (for example) certainly wasn't an M.D. In fact, I would consider it rude to address a PhD by Mr. or Ms. (at least in the case of someone older than myself, otherwise I would just use a first name).

Generally I would prefer to make the distinction, so no one assumes I'm an M.D., but the letters-after-the-name deal often isn't an option on official paperwork.

glutton79:

Chiks:

In academics, title is everything. In a business, it is work that matters. In academics, it is the title that matters. I have had professors correct me when I called them as Mr. XYZ, and they would say "It is Dr. XYZ" before continuing the discussion.

And how do you think those titles are earned? (Hint: you have to work for them).

But one does not have to be so ANAL about it......academicians are......the LW is just as anal.

Even I have earned quite a few titles.....but I never force anybody to call me with that title....

Is it possible that this is just an easy and concise way of answering a common question? I have a somewhat unusual job in a field that is not well-known and sometimes rather than go into a long-winded lecture to someone just to explain in a small-talk setting what I do, I simplify and say I'm an administrative professional or something like that. Maybe rather than going into the intricacies of the grad student situation, it's easier to just say, 'I'm a teacher." I'd say that's a better conversation starter than the LW's convoluted explanation.