Here we are again on a Monday - yes, I freely admit that I wait through the weekend to post. Why not? It's the one day of the week when I can put together three minutes with no obligations. That said - we went to see Hellboy this weekend, and it was really good. Fun/odd/not too scary, what more could you ask for?

I also admit to reading the posts before I write, and I have to say that this week in particular is so full of unmitigated crap that I'm going to have to get nasty. Be warned. Victory is a cheap poser - no one REALLY believes that she's the LW. I shan't respond to her. "DoveofChrist" seemed to me on first reading to be a fancy form of skeet.

To work.

1. Wow. This generated a whole lot of yap, didn't it? I could not believe how many people are sucked into the whole "switched at birth" fantasy. It's fascinating to me that people are so unwilling to make their own lives better that they would be willing to trade for someone else's life so they can fuck that up, too.

Sigh.

To all you morons who are telling this third-rate stalking weirdo to interfere in the lives of strangers.....

SHADDAP!

First - the original letter is an obvious fake. So is Victory, although she may now have convinced herself that she really is the LW by now. She's so rabid on the subject and so clearly irrational that she should be locked up somewhere......

Let's say that the LW does have a different blood type than her parents, that she actually did discover a switch. It's vanishingly rare and generally only happens in a work of fiction...wasn't there an awful Eddie Murphy movie about that? And a rather horrid movie with Mr. DiCaprio.....

Nonetheless. How does she know for an absolute fact that the woman she tracked down and conned into answering a whole pile of intrusive personal questions is actually the person she's hunting for? Answer? She doesn't! That's right, kids, nowhere in the letter does it say how or if she proved anything!

I know, I know, there was a photo....a photo that was clearly of a woman. Yeah, that's right, a picture of a woman with two eyes, a nose and a mouth....a human woman.... In her fevered imagination, any woman who looked human would, at that red-hot moment, be an exact mirror image of herself...

Whatever. If it happened, it was so long ago that ALL OF THE PARENTS ARE DEAD. The LW is middle-aged at the very least. She doesn't get to go waltzing into a stranger's home and announce that her family is not her family and her entire life was a lie.

It would be an ugly, cruel, intensely stupid thing to do, and would gain her no friends. In fact, depending on what state her stalking took place in, it COULD get her a jail term. That would be sad, because her true habitat is really a rubber room, but for the sake of her target it's a start to getting rid of this nut case once and for all.

2. Oh, dear God woman! You have the intestinal fortitude NOT to deny yourself to the point of marrying a man. You spend time reconciling yourself to your own reality, which sounds like it took a lot of work on your part. Kudos. Then, you meet someone you love, who loves you!

All this, all of this work and anguish to take control of your life and happiness, and you're still going to let your septugenarian parents DESTROY all that?

SHADDAP!

What are you using for brains here?! You aren't a kid any more. You don't have to listen to Mummy and Daddy when they tell you what to do, and it sounds like until now you haven't let them, either!

I don't blame your partner in the least for being angry with you. You are showing no respect for her or your relationship by obeying a pair of aging control freaks, and if you keep it up, you will lose the love of your life. Wake up!

Mummy and Daddy can't ground you any more. They can't send you to your room, they can't take away your phone. They can hurt you, though. They can destroy your life if you let them. Are you going to let them?

We see this nonsense on Prudie all the time. It can be the second wife, the racially different husband, you name it. You have to decide who you're going to spend your life with, keeping in mind that your parents are going to die before you.

Tell them, and tell them NOW that you will not attend ANY function where your partner is not welcome. Then follow through. It's as simple as that. If you don't follow through, then be prepared to become the old cat lady that never returns the ball that the kids kick into your yard accidentally, because that is where you'll end up.

As for your brother...he already knows, twit. Your parents are too nuts on the subject not to have told him long ago. Duh.

3. I'm not getting into this one. He's fudging on his job description. You're behaving like a three-year-old tattletale in public. You're both being stupid. You're being stupid and mean.

SHADDAP!

You married the guy. Clearly that was a mistake, since you think he's a liar. Leave the poor bastard now, before you have kids, and let him find a grown-up to marry.

4. You know dude, I feel sorry for you. Clearly your friend was important to you, obviously you're feeling a little guilt for not staying in contact with his family...yadda yadda yadda...

SHADDAP!

Call them already! Yeesh. Stop rhapsodizing about how you don't deserve your life (because that's a load of crap and you know it - you earned your life, dippy), get some counseling and get over yourself.

_____________________________

Yeesh.

Talk about a bunch of navel-gazing crapola this week. And for such stupid reasons.

I guess it just goes to show how far people are willing to let trivia into their lives. And yes. LW #1 is still a freakin' nut. Don't even go there with me, I'm not inclined to be kind to smarmy sentimental wieners today.....

You should probably be on cable.

...they'd quit the nasty press about Germans. 53 years after the war, and the shits in Hollywood are still at it. I guess they'll never forget the exodus. I was actually glad they picked on Russians for the bad guy in Indiana Jones, but a blue eyed devil it just had to be. Racism from Hollywood's Jewish directors? Who would have thunk it.

Yeah Hellboy was entertaining and it had the trivial shmaltz in it with which to impress, like in the Borshtbelt.

We need a higher class of Hollywood moguls.

Eh, it was wartime, I guess. Makes a nifty plot device. It's all bullshit, but what can you do? They were reasonably even-handed about making good guys out of two Germans at least...... and it was action-packed, which is always a good thing in a summer movie.

I'm sure there were a bunch of Russians (like my father's family, may they all die of advanced athlete's foot to the brain) who got pissy over the "Boris" stereotype in Indiana Jones.

I get offended when certain Hollywood "faces" decide that they should come out from in front of the camera and pretend they don't actually need a writer or six to look like they have a brain. What a mess that can become!

Hellboy isn't a new release. It was on cable two years ago on Showtime (in Australia anyways). I had an opportunity to get it on dvd but I had already seen it several times and wasn't interested at the time. Now I can't find anymore.

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LW# 1 - I agree this letter is a fake. It's almost like it was taken word for word from the movie Big Business with Bette Midler. Well the part about a rural hospital and switching newborns anyways. I couldn't find Victory's original posting so I never read it, but if you say that she/he is a fake, then I believe you.

Even if the letter wasn't fake, there is no way that the LW should try to worm her way into another family. The only possible reason would be if there was a need for medical histories. There was no mention of that need in the letter.

By the way she/he is not my kid! (note the signature and my fray handle).

LW# 2 - Definitely needs to get hit with the "grow up already" stick. You can't let your parents run your life forever. Once you are finished with school, you should be mature enough to run your own life. If your parents don't like the people that you choose to love, too bad. They are making you choose between your partner and your parents. Which will it be?

LW# 3 - I don't understand the problem here. Does he teach one or more classes at a college? If so, then calling himself a teacher is NOT a lie. Just because he is also studying and working toward a post graduate degree, does not mean that he is not a teacher. In fact a good teacher will be studying his/her whole life, regardless of intervening degrees or certifications.

LW# 4 - I lost a great friend many years ago too. And fell out of touch with his parents at the same time. He was crossing train tracks on a country road and didn't see the train coming. I fully believe that they would be honored, not horified, if I had named my child after him (I don't have any children that I'll admit to). And I'm sure they would want to know about it too. Talk to them, maybe a few times, before you bring up your offspring. Who knows, maybe just seeing you again will rip open the old wounds, and having a name-sake for their son will help heal them.

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There are unfortunately few groups that can be used in "era" movies as the bad guys. If a movie represents any time between the first and second world war, then the Germans were the bad guys. It's also well known that Hitler was deeply into the occult, which makes the Hellboy thing more believable. Sorry, but that won't change no matter who makes the movie. If it was the cold war (i.e. the newest Indiana Jones movie), then it was the Russians. China or North Korea will probably feature in one of the next big era pieces, followed by one or more African nations. Having a well known "bad guy" as your villains makes the whole movie more believable.

By the way, am I the only one who is annoyed by having 20 top posts with the same or very much similar titles all saying the same things?

I.E. "Switched at Birth"

You're thinking of a different movie. It's actually on TV tonight.

The sequel ("Hellboy II, something about a Golden Horde") to the one you've seen was just released this past Friday, we saw it in the theater on Saturday. It's better than the first movie, and the way is wide open for a sequel by the end. I suspect if this one makes the amount of money the studio wallahs are predicting, we'll be seeing yet another Hellboy within two years.

You are back in fine form today! The time off was well spent.

MessyONE:

...The LW is middle-aged at the very least. She doesn't get to go waltzing into a stranger's home and announce that her family is not her family and her entire life was a lie. It would be an ugly, cruel, intensely stupid thing to do, .....

So? Are you seriously suggesting that a nutcase like that could do something reaonsable and kind for a family of strangers? Like leave them alone? We're not talking about a person with normal intelligence, are we? Sheesh!

MessyONE:

And yes. LW #1 is still a freakin' nut. Don't even go there with me, I'm not inclined to be kind to smarmy sentimental wieners today.....

Well...why don't you just come out and tell us what you really think! hee hee hee!

SomebodyElse:

They are making you choose between your partner and your parents. Which will it be?

Making someone choose between people is like speaking first when salary comes up in a job interview. Whoever does it, automatically loses. If someone tells me I must choose between them and any other person, then obviously, they see me as expendable.

And yes, when there are 20 identically named top posts, I can only keep track of them (if then) by how many +'s or -'s they got or how many responses they have.

tonto_goldberg:

Are you seriously suggesting that a nutcase like that could do something reaonsable and kind for a family of strangers? Like leave them alone? We're not talking about a person with normal intelligence, are we? Sheesh!

The problem is, the LW is wanting to deal with fantasy people, but instead would be dealing with real people. People who may have skeletons which are best left alone. People who may be psychos like herself.

If the other family is nicer than the one she grew up with, they may put up with her, for a time, out of confused politeness. If they are scumbags, the other woman may want to kill herself when she finds out she had to grow up with these monsters, when she might not even have belonged to them. Most likely, the truth is somewhere in between. I believe most people would find her rather creepy, what with her lame cover story and all.

If the other woman has grown kids, they've probably already scolded her for letting some stranger rummage about in her house. If they get the LW's name, they'll be doing some serious background checking if she pops up again.

Odds are, when the LW starts to see that they have flaws, just like the original family, she'll want to wash her hands of them.

Of course, all this hinges on whether the first letter was a total fake or not. Personally, I am convinced it was, or that the other family is as gullible as she is obsesssed.

I was just waiting for all of those silly top-posting "find your mama" ninnies to start howling at me. Somehow I doubt they will, or they would have been here already.

I predict a large throng at the gates to Pretentious Island over the next couple of days.

Some of the wannabe's will be current or former grad students telling us that a teaching assistantship is not a real job. Considering how many Ph.D's there are working as baristas and bar-tenders, they have earned their admission ticket. That, and the fact that people who like to argue a lot will wind up ABD forever after they piss off their dissertation committee.

I'm willing to bet that the reason no one's arguing against you is that it's a waste of time to take your posts seriously.

I REALLY belong to a different set of dead parents who left behind a much larger estate that I feel entitled to share in.

all of you smarm-meisters have begun to realize just how absurd you all look. You can't tell me that this fantasy about being a lost princess, switched at birth by an evil fairy is something you take seriously, do you?

I can see it now, all you (or whoever, I'm on a roll here) need to do is find your REAL Mummy and Daddy and they'll take you away from all "this" (Personally, I like my "this", but if you insist...) and marry you off to your Handsome Prince, a big-dicked, but sensitive and chess playing potentate with a massive trust fund and multiple residences who only wants to worship you and keep you in the luxury to which you'd like to become accustomed!

Egad woman! You did!

See, NO ONE takes me seriously. No one. Really. I like it that way. I tell people all the time NOT to take me seriously. This thread? Pure nonsense! This is for entertainment purposes only - that's why most of us are here in the first place.

If someone strings me a line of bullshit, I'll jump on that train and take it wherever it wants to go. I certainly don't think that 99% of this is real. If you do, then you have issues that have nothing to do with me and everything to do with your own sense of self-importance.