Putting aside the fact the LW must not be very close to her brother, either physically or emotionally, for him not to know she's been with a woman for 2 years, why isn't her problem easily solved by coming out to him but asking he keep it a secret from Mom and Dad? Clearly they aren't going to discuss it with him, so how'd they know if she did tell him?

And how exactly did she get caught basically agreeing to Mom and Dad's demands? Are they loaded so she's fearful of being cut out of the will? Because otherwise I don't see what's standing in her way. Their relationship is strained at best and they've made it clear that SO isn't ever going to be welcome in their home.

You know, just because you are legally an adult doesn't mean that it is always easy to defy one's parents. For some people it is - but those people have reasonable, laid-back families, or they've always been the rebellious type. If your family isn't reasonable or laid-back, and you're not that type, then it's harder, because it's the way you were raised. Going against your parents' wishes is painful, and involves sacrifices. If some people are reluctant to face that pain unless pushed to the extreme, that doesn't mean they're just looking for inheritance money.

Anyway, what is the lady supposed to do? Have her girlfriend crash a family function? If they don't want to meet her, they don't want to meet her.

It was clearly difficult for this woman to disengage from others' opinions, particularly those close to her. The fact that she lived a lie for so long (and probably hurt two men) indicates she needs to gain personal strength and self-esteem. It wil take her time. However, I agree with Prudie that, as an adult, she really should work on standing up to her parents and setting her own ground rules If they are are willing to reject her, it will be painful, but it will not be her fault. I have to agree that if I was her SO, I would be angry and hurt. If she is happy with this woman, she needs to come to terms with living life as an adult. Otherwise, she wil lead a loveless life.