Honestly, I see kind of a gap between reality and what women post on blogs/forums/dating sites. Surfing through dating sites and forums, I keep reading things like "well he'd have to speak at least five languages", or "I'm only interested in guys that are 6'3" or taller", or "he has to have a great career like being a doctor or lawyer, or personally rescuing endangered tiger cubs and nursing them back to health with his own breast milk while fighting off Iranian jihadist assassins." Then when I encounter females in the course of real life, they're actually dating a five foot tall pot dealer named Thumper who's "super into the emo scene", doesn't bathe, and dropped out of community college so he could practice guitar and play Hello Kitty Island Adventure on his XBox.

My going theory is that for women, the ones complaining on the internet have overly high standards, while the ones who actually date have a hard time differentiating between a guy who's offbeat and independent and a fruitcake. And before i get flamed for obviously being bitter, yes I am bitter and am aware of it. And I'm not a misogynist, I'm a misanthrope. There's a difference.

I really need to meet Thumper. I'm a journalist and he sounds like excellent fodder for a feature story. The photos alone, my God.

Seriously, the ones you meet on dating sites are alone for a reason. They're too particular. The ones you meet who are dating losers/XBox champions like Thumper are just desperate.

Most of us are not that desperate and settled down into marriage/long term relationships/comfortable single life with pleasure and normal men, or women depending on your flavor of choice.

level of confidence. I'm not a great looking dude. I don't have any money. But, I've never had a hard time with women. Why? I seriously think it's two things: I don't care if they don't want to talk to me, I move on. I look them in the eye, but am not afraid to compliment them on their ass. If a woman can't take a compliment (in the proper setting) on her ass, the I don't want to talk to her anyway because she's uptight.

Oh, I also never talk about their current or former men problems with them. I'll lose respect for them for putting up with shit if I engage in that. Also, that's the fastest way to "friendville", the city in which you never get laid.

Too much!-----Kudos.

I've been to friendville, too many Creepy Uncle Willy stories for my taste.

Oh, definitely. The first mention of childhood molestation and you've got to run. If you've known a woman for three hours and she's sharing that sort of info with you, then you're in for a long strange trip that will end with her in the front yard naked but for a strap-on and you with a bewildered look on your face as the cops storm the bedroom.

I think there was an onion article that said it best: "Relationship tragically bypasses physical intimacy, goes straight to emotional intimacy."

You guys are like the Abbott and Costello of the new millennium. I love it. You should be pals.

So maybe you're right. Plus, I need someone to read The Onion for me and report the good stuff, because I always forget to read it myself.

Maybe the problem here is your desire to generalize about what "women" want, instead of dealing with each of us as the individuals we are. I can't tell you what any other woman wants, and nothing any other woman says can be ascribed to me. Just Ellen Tien's statement about "all the other men I know" is worthless and misguided, so is any statement about women want.

For example, I wanted a history buff with a sarcastic sense of humour, who loved dogs, spiders and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, didn't want kids, could hold down a job, and wouldn't be put off by me eating raw hamburger.

It took some looking, and I really don't think I would have found him on eharmony.com. If nothing else, we are athiests so eharmony would have rejected us.

Is that what you figured women want?

Freki

Fax, you rock...lol

Spot on, bagelwoman.

Come one, come all, lets get on the individual differences bandwagon!

As for my answer:

Air, Water, Food, Shelter, and an impossible combination of ever changing and often mutually exclusive attributes.

No Freki! You've shattered my fanatasies of being offered beer and sex while gaming (not to mention free pet sitting) and replaced them with an image of a woman shoveling raw hamburger into her face. Now my only hope of romance is to start wearing eye shadow, quit bathing, and go emo at the evil corporations until I attract a girl. That or go find some puppies to save from terrorists...

But really, there's an obvious answer to 'what women want' that's best summed up in a quote:

"Mel Gibson, Kyle. Mel Gibson."

"But really, there's an obvious answer to 'what women want' that's best summed up in a quote:

"Mel Gibson, Kyle. Mel Gibson."

I shattered YOUR fantasy! Aw, gods, now I can't get Mel Gibson out of my head. Bleagh.

I was willing to get all my previous boyfriends beer while gaming, but I have found that offering sex while gaming either results in me getting rejected (a bad omen for the relationship) or in him losing his game in a hurry. Gaming, like driving, should not coincide with sex.

Sorry about the raw hamburger image, I was raised by wolves.* Would it have been cuter if I just said I growl in my sleep?

Freki

* okay, WITH wolves, but it sounds cooler the other way.