Alas, Suzie, there are many Christian (and others) who cannot see the world from such an enlightened, accepting view as yours. As most of my experience is with the Christian side of this (growing up in a small town in Texas), I can only speak to that firsthand.
I find it amazing how heavily they cherry-pick their justification to ostracize, demonize and marginalize anyone who's appreciably different from them. It doesn't fit with my understanding of Christian teachings (I was raised in the Methodist church) and from my reading of your post, it doesn't square with yours either.
Last night John Stewart called out James Dobson on the Daily Show for his interesting ability to forget his own cherry-picking of the old testament while saying Obama shouldn't quote the old testament when he's talking about fundamentalists who want to convert the US to a theocracy.
It makes it all the more amusing when the leaders of send-me-money megachurches get caught cavorting with drug-dealing prostitutes and other such hypocrisy.