After years of debate, California has finally legalized gay marriage. While I have no problem with that per se, I do wonder why. Not why we’d make it legal, but why would gays even want to get married? Haven’t they seen the misery that married straight people go through? Don’t they realize that 50 percent of all marriages end up in divorce? Don’t they realize that marriage simply marks the end of sex and the beginning of love handles, loss of self and identity, depression and death? It’s a fact that 100 percent of people who are married die! That’s a staggering statistic.

Frankly, I’m concerned about the ramifications that gay marriage would cause. Thus far, gays on TV, movies and in West Hollywood have been a happy, quirky and fashionable lot. With their quick wit and stylish fashion sense they make the world a better place. Who doesn’t want a gay friend to go shopping with or to give them advice on which moisturizer to use to get rid of those little eye wrinkles? Damn you sun! Now, I know I’m being selfish here, but I’m just worried about what will happen to the gay community once they are introduced to an evil and destructive institution like marriage. Will they become angry and bitter? Will they lose their zeal and color matching ability? Will their “fabulousness” just disappear? Will they become mindless androids like their straight and married counterparts? That’s not a risk I’m willing to take.

Marriage – What is it good for? Absolutely Nothing
Why do people get married anyway? Love…that’s laughable. Are you telling me you can’t be in love without a legal document certifying it? Money…nope, divorce costs way more than a marriage. Security…right, because married people don’t cheat. The only reasonable explanation is tradition. Yup, people have been doing it so long that it’s just become second nature. Nobody questions it, they just do it. Of course, following tradition isn’t always a good idea. Just ask the lemmings.

Love It or Leave It
Instead of marriage, I propose (pun intended) that we implement a “relationship lease.” It would be similar to Ford’s “Love It or Leave It” lease. You pick a lease term of either 2, 3 or 4 years and agree to a certain amount of set lease rules. Then at the end of the term you decide whether or not you want to continue with the relationship or whether you simply want to walk away and get something new.

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Thank you thank you thank you. Marriage is conventional, and the only reason for it is the healthcare, legal, and tax benefits. It's just an economic institution, and one that discriminates at that. I love that the law is saying "if you're gay you can get these benefits too" but WHEN will the law say "if you're SINGLE you can get these benefits too"???

If marriage were about love then it wouldn't exist- people would just stay with the person they love because they love them. It is a very recent ideal that marriage is based on love. It's always been used as mechanism for economics, social structure, class, and public health.

buggie:

It's just an economic institution, and one that discriminates at that. I love that the law is saying "if you're gay you can get these benefits too" but WHEN will the law say "if you're SINGLE you can get these benefits too"???

But most of the "benefits" aren't applicable to single people. They usually are structured around giving your spouse your stuff after death, making medical decisions for them, etc. Why would a single person want the benefit of making medical decisions for another adult?

Marriage should be a spiritual institution *or* a legal one; joining church and state in holy matrimony is supposed to be a big no-no in the US. I don't think we should abolish marriage, but it needs some reformatting.

PhysicsGirl:

buggie:

It's just an economic institution, and one that discriminates at that. I love that the law is saying "if you're gay you can get these benefits too" but WHEN will the law say "if you're SINGLE you can get these benefits too"???

But most of the "benefits" aren't applicable to single people. They usually are structured around giving your spouse your stuff after death, making medical decisions for them, etc. Why would a single person want the benefit of making medical decisions for another adult?

Because maybe you are really close to that adult. That relationship is just as important as important in as romantic relationship. Maybe you want someone you trust to make decisions for you in the hospital or get everything by default after you die. This could be your sibling, your cousin, your best friend since first grade- just because you're not having sex with them, why should your relationship count less?

But also, it's NOT just about medical decisions and who gets what when you die. One of the biggest issues is health insurance: married people (or even cohabitating couples on some plans) can include their spouse on their plan (and children). So a married person can have 2 people on their plan whereas I can only have one- that is getting compensated differently for the same work (and last time I checked, that's discrimination). What if I have a parent/friend/sibling/whoever who needs health insurance too? they don't count because I'm not having sex with them? What if **I** lose my job? If I were married, I could hop right on my husband's health plan. But wait, I'm not married, and therefore screwed.

Furthermore, a married couple filing taxes jointly is taxed at a lower rate than a single person who makes the same amount. Therefore, if you're married and you're working but your spouse isn't (or there is a large difference in your wages) you're allowed to keep more of your money than the single worker who makes the same amount. For example, if I make $50K/year, and my coworker makes $50K/year but is married to someone who doesn't work, more of my $50K is taxed than his. How is THAT not discrimination? "Marital status" has NO business being on the tax form in the first place. I thought we had a separation of church and state in this country. Oh wait, we do, just not when it comes to the all-blessed married people.

I'm not an attorney, but I'd imagine that most of those arrangements could be set up with the proper set of contracts, wills, power of attorney, medical proxy, etc. about the only thing you probably couldn't do would be to pass on a pension or social security benefit.

It's much more complex than a city hall marriage license, and more expensive up front, but also probably easier and cheaper to sever than the nonsense that so many divorces seme to devolve into....