On Friday afternoon, I phoned a friend to tell her that I would have to change my plans to be with her and her husband on Saturday. I could tell immediately that something was wrong. "Have you heard?" she blurted. Before I could respond, she said, "Tim Russert is dead." She had been crying, and her husband had been crying. I was shocked by the news, and initially, I was a little taken aback by their response.

But, then I stopped to think about it. I did not reflect on when John F. Kennedy was assassinated. I did not think about the shocking losses of Dr. King or Robert F. Kennedy or Malcolm X. My first thought was of my response to the death of John Steinbeck on December 20, 1968. I was a senior in high school, and John Steinbeck was my favorite author. I was raised in the San Joaquin Valley of California, which might explain some of my love for this writer. Also, my parents read his novels, and we discussed them at the dinner table or after dinner in the living room. When I heard the news of his death, it was as if I had lost a member of my family. I cried.

It turns out that Tim Russert held that kind of place for my friend and her husband. Her husband's father had loved Tim Russert and had followed his career closely. For her husband, watching "Meet the Press" was like being with his father who died last year.

Also, because Tim Russert's death was so sudden, people didn't have time to absorb the loss as they did with, say, Peter Jennings. One would think that after several generations of living with television and TV personalities, we would learn how to deal with these events better. Apparantly, though, on some level, for many of us, actors, broadcasters, and personalities of every sort find their way into the fabric of our lives more deeply than we realize.

Fortunately, for my friend and her husband, they are also great fans of Tiger Woods. After grieving deeply for Mr. Russert, and watching the outpouring on MSNBC for several hours on Friday, they turned to the US Open and watched the amazing play of Mr. Woods on his way to the hard fought championship.

John Steinbeck wrote in "East of Eden," I think, "We should remember our dying and try to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world." For many people, Tim Russert may be the best example of a person who tried to do this that we have at this time.