1. Stepmom;

Silly question... you can do the same thing to keep the boys' mother from hurting them that you can do to prevent anything else from hurting them. Simply poison them. Once they are dead it will no longer be possible for other people or the various vicissitudes of life to cause them any pain. So long as they remain breathing, however, they can be - and, more to the point, will be - regularly hurt. Life is a bitch that way (which in no way should be seen as excusing the fact that their Mom is too). So short of killing the little tykes, dear, all you can really do is try to make certain that you do not cause them needless pain and suffering and be there with the hugs and cookies when other people aren't so kind. That's it. Now stop whining...

2. Harrassed;

Poison him. Or just tell him to fuck off. Either way should work. Either way stop puling like a two-year old and grow a pair. If you've been putting up with this shit for over a year now it is clear you are a champion doormat. Nobody particularly likes doormats - except people like your masher friend perhaps - but absolutely everyone despises a whining doormat.

3. Stiffed;

And yet another one... Just poison him. God knows, with you cooking for him three times a week the opportunity comes up often enough and you must have considered it a time or two on your own. anyone would have, under the circumstances. Failing that, stop whining to Prudence (and through her column to the entire world) and discuss it with the only person in the world who can actually do anything about it: him. I get it that you'd rather not alienate this cretin but if it's driving you nuts - or broke - what reasonable choice do you have? Until he comes around, if he ever does, you can save a bit of money by serving only generic macaroni and cheese with $2/bottle screwtop wine when he dines at your house. Maybe he'll take the hint. If not cheap wine and cheddar cheese cover the taste of many effective poisons.

4. Not;

Okay... I'm thinking poisoning her might be inappropriate. Perhaps you could poison yourself. Or you could continue to manufacture ridiculous things to feel guilty about, but if you don't stop whining about them to other people, sooner or later one of them is apt to poison you just to stop the whining. And I won't blame them...

5. Junior;

Where the hell do they keep finding you people? [heavy sigh] Poison the bitch. Then poison yourself. If you are honestly all worked up because a "friend" of yours will cut you off from your entire social circle if you don't rearrange your entire life to fit her party plans you really don't have much to live for... like a life of your own, for example. Here's a quick tip for you. If your "friend" would actually do something like that, she ain't your friend to begin with. If the rest of your "friends" let her do it, they aren't really your friends either. Grow some balls, tell her to go fuck herself and stop the fucking whining!!!

Graylodge:

If not cheap wine and cheddar cheese cover the taste of many effective poisons.

Almond cookies, or an alcoholic beverage with an almond taste. According to the movies, it covers up the taste of (I believe) cyanide. Quick and effective, unless you're using it on the cat.

Here is some night shade.

Don't agree that Stiffed should poison him, yet. They need to get married first and then she can poison him. In fact that may be how she is a stay at home single mom....

jking.

OMG! And her "successful boyfriend" is her defense attorney who helped her beat the rap and he knows damn well how much money she has laying around from the late Mr. Moneybags and she better be forking out a Henry the VIII banquet (chocolates and wine? who are these people?) if she knows what's good for her, that is.

GL, where were you for Diaper Dan? And no, I don't think he's a pedophile.

But I do think the boyfriend dating the single stay-at-home mom with the drinking problem is.

mermaid33:

GL, where were you for Diaper Dan? And no, I don't think he's a pedophile.

I had to take a week off and last week seemed like a good time. If I had expended the effort to reply to last week's batch of whiners I probably would have had a stroke. At the very least, I would have offended nearly everyone... and Diaper Dan would have probably been my mildest reply.

mermaid33:

But I do think the boyfriend dating the single stay-at-home mom with the drinking problem is.

I don't know that I'd jump on the assumption that he's a pedophile. It's pretty clear he's an asshole and it seems likely that they are both lushes. She needs to take poison. Something slow, hideous and excruciating. Something that will give her a real reason to whine...

I was only kidding; my sarcastic sense of humor is apparently so dry as to be nonexistent.

I have a half empty bottle of gopher-poison she can have. You heard me right - half empty. He's either dead or sleeping off one helluva warfarin hangover.

stepmom,

is it possible that you can not see the hostile territory you are planning to live in? what are you doing with a man with two kids and an out of control ex wife?

if you think you can rescue these kids and live happily ever after with this guy, you're delusional. my advice is to wait until these kids are out on their own and then you can play house with their father

louie1a:

what are you doing with a man with two kids and an out of control ex wife?

If every potential mate were eliminated because of their ex being a jerk, there would be virtually no second marriages. It sounds like they have a reasonable relationship in the current household, and that other than gender, the non-custodial jerk parent is no different from millions of others. (Though there are plenty of other mothers like her, too.) The mistake they've been making is covering for her for so long.

If every time the mother had promised a bicycle or a PlayStation or whatever, they had simply let her NOT give it, instead of giving it to the kids in her name, the kids would know by now to take her promises with a grain of salt. Instead, the couple have trained the ex that she can promise the moon, and be able to "give" it to the kids, without spending anything more than the cost of a phone call to her ex.