1) I have taken on HER problem. How do I fix it for her?:

The LW has covered for the mom in the past to keep her from looking bad. The mom tried to make herself look better than the LW by making a bad (in more than one way) promise. Now she wants to keep the mom from looking bad? No wonder the fiancée dumped that manipulative bitch.

The child was already told he couldn’t have the phone until he was 15, so he is playing the mom to get what he wants. The mom made a promise she can’t keep. The mom thinks the LW will cover for her like always (Why should she think any different?). Make the mom deal with her own problems because this child is already well on his way to being a real handful. It sounds like LW is getting a crash-course in parenting.

2) He makes me pay my own way most of the time, and I cook dinner for him a lot. How do I get him to change?:

I read this letter and almost burst out laughing. This letter would have seemed so much different coming from a guy (I bet Prudie’s response would have been too). She complains that she has to pay for her own dinner most of the time, and that he eats at her house when she invites him over to dinner. The LW being a Single Stay-At-Home Mom, I have to wonder where the money for this actually comes from in the first place. It sounds like she is used to someone else footing the bill for everything already.

I agree that he is quite the cheapskate, but this plays out in the opposite direction all the time and guys are expected to “suck it up”. If she doesn’t like it, stop inviting him over and stop breaking out the good stuff every time he comes over. Maybe she should stop trying to impress him so much all the time and just make some regular food because it isn’t too hard to make a pretty great meal for less than $25 (excluding wine).

I would also suggest cutting back a bit on the wine. I don’t have a problem with a couple of glasses with dinner, but a couple of bottles several times a week is just screaming for an intervention (maybe even from CPS).

3) I’m an Atheist and I told her I would pray. Am I going to Hell?:

I think the LW handled it just fine. It would have been highly inappropriate for her to use this situation to step on this lady’s beliefs. It sure couldn’t have done anything to improve her boss’s view of her. She needs to just get over it because it’s not like she’s going to get kicked out of the Good Atheists Society.

4) I’m an adult with a job. How do I keep my CHILDhood friend from throwing a tantrum?:

The LW is an adult now. She needs to make an adult decision. She could ask her boss to start a little later (She should have asked when she first accepted the job). He could say yes. He could say no. That is an easy fix for this particular situation.

The real problem here is her tantrum-throwing friend. This friend only acts the way she does because it gets the results she wants. The LW needs to stand up and stop letting herself be controlled like this. She may lose the “friendship”, but she would also be free from having to deal with this in the future.

All of the LW’s friends are probably waiting for someone brave enough to finally stand up to the hissy-fit girl. I would be willing to bet that the first person to make that move will see the balance of power shift in their direction. If not, it could be time to get a more mature circle of friends.

Do not give in and tell him or buy him the phone . If she made him the promise she needs to tell him herself . The mom is taking advantage of you and the dad by telling him she willdo things and does not do it . Don't you think she knows you are going to cover her butt ? Why should you and dad keep covering her and letting her look good . Let her deal with her own short comings . You already told him when he was 15 you would consider the phone , then stick to it . The child is never going to learn maturity and patients if you give in early . Kids at age 10 are not mature enough to have a job and know the value of a dollar . When he is 15 he can mowe lawns to help pay the bill then he can have one . I don't think kids need such a gift if they are not going to be responsible for helping pay the bill . What are you going to do when he runs the bill up over $1000.00 a month texting or going over his minutes plan and you have to cover the bill ? Believe me they do it all the time and think mom and dad will pay it . If they are not going to help pay the bill get a prepaid , like tracfone , then once the airtime is gone , they have to pay more before getting to use it . Teach them responsibility not give me , give me , give me .