"In other words, procreation: teaching your daughter how babies are made, not how to go down on the kid next door."

This is probably not the guy from whom to borrow a phrase, but... Jiminy!

I have spent a significant part of the last 20 years or so changing (evolving, I'd like to think) into a more tolerant, progressive thinking and generous human being/sarcastic ass. But, well, I have a daughter (years away from this, unless there is more to Montessori than I've seen), and though I know its quixotic at best, I am going to address the above the old-fashioned way.

First, with respect to procreation, I'm going to explain to her how babies are made, how to avoid that, and why it's important to do so.

Second, with respect to the kid next door, I'm going to invite said kid next door over for a soda and calmly explain to him that the fleeting joy of the moment will be lost in the endless hours of agony and regret as he dies a slow death, castrated and duct-taped to a tree, miles from anyone who could hear his screams.

On second thought, who am I kidding? I am going to address the above the real old-fashioned way...

...and let my wife handle it.