1. Waiting;

You ask, "How do I sit down and ask my mother about something I'm not even supposed to know?"... You don't, you unmitigated moron! But then I wouldn't expect you to understand that since you evidently don't even understand that you don't go through your mother's private papers without her knowledge and consent or that you and your sisters have no rights at all in this matter. I almost hope you do confront your mother and demand answers. Maybe then she'll put your ass out on the street where it belongs. I am not surprised you are still living at home with Mommy though... a person with so little respect for boundaries as you display is unlikely to have an easy time finding housemates or partners who will tolerate them and family, as Robert Frost reflected, has to take you in. At 21. however, you are old enough to kick out of the nest and should you decide to continue flapping your jaw about this matter you will give her every legitimate excuse in the world to do just exactly that.

Wary;

You ask, "what should I do in the meantime?"... You should mind your own fucking business is what you should do. Unless she is schizophrenic (and I mean certifiable by a professional) you have no standing whatever to interfere. Even if she actually is romantically involved with gramps there, it is none of your affair and it is perfectly legal - whether most folks find it a bit creepy or not. Spend time with your sister if you (and she) like. Be concerned for her well being if you must. But do not interfere in her choices as she explores the world and becomes the woman she will be. It ain't your place to judge. It ain't your place to condemn. And it sure as hell ain't your place to interfere.

3. Separate;

Oh for Pete's sake... Stop whining, grow some balls and tell anyone stupid enough to comment on your choices and decisions regarding child-rearing to fuck off and die. This is such a non-issue for most people... You are pathetic.

4. Wing;

I laughed so hard tears leaked from my eyes. If you really need Prudie - or anyone else - to tell you how to handle this situation you kind of deserve to get shit on... and you will get shit on - and not just by the birds.

My God, you people are strange...

I'll bet you a buck that LW #1 was snooping in mom's room, looking for her will.

Oh hell no, LW#1 was looking for dirty romance novels, sex toys, and/or condoms. The interesting envelope was a sad second prize until she opened it.

I once made the mistake of looking for something in my dad's night side table when I was fairly young. I don't remember what I was looking for or how old I was (I'd like to say 10ish), but I DO remember what I found and how fast I legged it out of there.

AC - just what did you find?

kidsgrown:

AC - just what did you find?

I'll decline the earlier bet but go a buck that AC found a .45 <g>

ArchaeologyChick:

LW#1 was looking for dirty romance novels, sex toys, and/or condoms.

Maybe the drugstore was out.

Graylodge:

kidsgrown:

AC - just what did you find?

I'll decline the earlier bet but go a buck that AC found a .45 <g>

I'll double that bet, and bet she found some graphic porn.

IncogNeato:

I'll double that bet, and bet she found some graphic porn.

yuk! Probably 20-25% of American homes have handguns in nightstand drawers. I don't know what the porn industy's market penetration is, but I never really thought it was that high., so I figure the odds are stronger on a gun. On the other hand, her reaction to what she found suggests you may be right. I'll decline the double. <g>

When I was in high school, I went to a convention with several hundred (total) other girls. One of my 3 roommates found some porn sticking out from under the nightstand. Two of us covered our heads with our pillows, while she proceeded to read one of the "stories" out of the mag, and she and her bedmate made comments about the pictures. There was a definite "yuck!" factor.

Just don't reach in thinking you are grabbing the vibrator & grab the gun by mistake.

My mother had a really annoying habit of taking things away from me that I'd received as gifts by telling me that it was "too old for me" and keeping them for herself. I became obsessed with a needlepoint project that I'd gotten a few years earlier, my mother had taken away and put in her closet. I would see it every time I went to put away her clothes. Every once in a while I would ask her if I could have the kit and she continued to tell me it was too advanced for me. I was probably 14 or so.

Well, one day I was putting clothes away and I noticed that the needlepoint kit was no longer sitting where it had for the past few years. I immediately suspected that my mother had started the project herself, working on it while we slept or were at school. I resolved that the next time my parents were out I would investigate.

My mom was out shopping with my bro & sis and my dad was in the garage shooting pool with one of his friends from work. I went into the closet and started rooting around on the top shelf. I found, way on the left hand side, two slim paperback books.

Well, you know me, if it's printed I have to know what it says. I can't remember the titles but the writing was incredibly bad, even to my 14 year old eye, and so juvenile in both form and print size that I was able to absorb way more than I wanted to in a short time. What I do remember is that it was about a father having sex with his willing teenage daughter.

Needless to say, my blood ran cold. I was shaking so bad I thought I was going to drop everything on the floor and I became acutely aware of the sound of billiard balls cracking in the distance. I put everything back where I had found it and booked it out of there and ran into my room and shut the door. I didn't come out till everyone else was home.

My parents separated later that year. I wasn't sorry he was gone and resisted my mother's attempts to send me on overnight visitation, alone, with him.

So you see what happens when you snoop, kids? (lol)

mermaid33:

So you see what happens when you snoop, kids? (lol)

I repeat... yuk!!!

Just my opinion, of course, but any man with daughters who would have that kind of smut in his house - or in his head, for that matter - needs his ass kicked... and his daughters kept as far as humanly possible away from him. That shit is just plain creepy.

dumb_blonde:

Just don't reach in thinking you are grabbing the vibrator & grab the gun by mistake.

As long as both of them are equipped with trigger locks there should be no tragedies greater than acute embarassment resulting from such a mistake. <g>

When I asked around my Canadian friends what they thought was in the bedside drawer, the unanimous choice was sex aids....at least for others. I mused to my husband that the gun in the drawer must be an American thing. He, who traveled and lived extensively in the US said "Gun? No, not in the drawer, that's under the pillow. "

Ack, sorry it took so long... trying to get shit done!

Got SOME shit done.

Anyway, no gun. I probably would have played with the gun and shot someone.

I found an almost completely empty box of condoms. Just one little foil wrapped square sitting there half out of the box, staring up at me, saying "Your parents have sex. A LOT!"

Hey, I was young and it freaked me out. It was so gross, to my little innocent mind, that it was years before I could tell the story - the memory was... oogie.

I think I could have handled graphic porn - I would have thought my parents were gross but lame. I could have handled a romance novel. I probably could have handled other sex toys because I wouldn't have known what they were for... but there is something so obvious about a condom. It means sex is happening and since they are one use deals, a mostly empty box means sex is happening More Than Once! Personally I liked the idea that my parents had sex three times. In the dark. Possibly through a hole in the sheet. How horrible, I thought, to find out differently.

The tale of incest porn, however, is a whole different ball park. That is scaring. Condoms sound down right germane.