As to the first letter (we'll call it, snooping for sisters), oh my, my, we've opened up the snooping bugaboo again, haven't we? Just tell mom that you hear she was quite the roundheels back in the day, and were curious if she were hiding any byblows in the bushes. See what she says! My prediction? Hilarity ensues.

For the LW "Wary of Older Men", first, before taking action, make sure that the man in question isn't Harrison Ford, Paul Newman or some other aging heartthrob actor. They are so commonly put in this situation on screen that they don't realize that it's frowned upon. Also, consider the possible inheritance benefits.

To "Separate Beds," I say your main concern is that none of your kids are sleeping together and you shouldn't worry what others think of your own familially feigned forswearing of nookie. If you don't think Greg snuck down the hall to Marsha's room on occasion, you're just naive.

And finally, I save my most concise advice for our dear avian averse friend, "On the Wing."

Bird poison or shotgun, whichever. Administered to the bird or the roommate, whichever.