So I get a call from The Reverend this morning...

Seems our good friend Bill and his wife are having problems.

Seems Bill works the graveyard shift, during the weekend.

Seems while Bill was at work, wife was taking their two kids under the age of two over to her mom's house where she would leave them and go out and party with her girlfriend till the wee hours.

Seems like I've heard this story before somewhere.

Oh yeah, guess where Bill met his wife?

In a bar. Seems that she was engaged to another fella at the time but broke it off when she flirted and danced with Bill and he started buying her and her girlfriend drinks.

So, right now each has one kid in their possession. She's a native of the Phillippines, so there's a concern there. They've been evicted from their apartment as of today, he's lost his job last week, he's had her arrested twice for domestic violence in the last three months.

Something tells me it's going to be a bumpy weekend!

Hope yours goes better, Fellow Fraysters! ;)

Poor kids. He needs to find the kids' passports, or get some, and lock them in a safe deposit box. If she's been arrested for violence, he should be able to get custody, if he can find a job. Otherwise, they could both lose custody.

There's an old expression around here. If you met your spouse in a bar, chances are you're married to a barfly.

(Go ahead and blast me with 10,000 exceptions. I know it's not a given, but it is a bad start.)

IncogNeato:

If she's been arrested for violence, he should be able to get custody

Is it going to shock you that in the great state of Cali the judge would say something like, "Okay, it's clear that you two don't get along, but how is she with the kids?" and unless he has something about her hitting the kids the judge is going to figure that those kids need both parents and Bill may get primary physical custody but the visitation is going to be as close to 50/50 as they can manage. All her violence toward him will get is a restraining order between the two of them that means they'll have to meet in a neutral place to exchange or a third party will have to do it for her.

And the minute he accuses her of being a drunk she's going to accuse him of smoking pot and the judge will order that they both be subjected to random drug testing within 24 hours notice by opposing counsel for the next 18 years.

I told him, as much as he doesn't want to, as much as he wants to "win" this, he really needs to sit down and figure out how they're going to amicably look at each other during the custody exchange every Christmas Eve for the next 18 years.

This is a whole can o' worms he does not want to open!

The bottom feeding bitch HITS him? And he lets her get away with it? Is she even a citizen? Could he get her ass deported and be able to keep both of the kids? The kids were born in the States, right?

The reason, I ask these questions is, because I have a friend, Vikdahl, from the land of Czeska Repulika. Ms Blue had many ties with the Czech Republic, but good ole Vikdahl came to the states during the era of the (oh so passe) communism. Vikdahl had been imprisoned for six months due to a controversial film he made at FAMU (the film institute in Praque).

Anyway, he managed to come to the states on a VISA in 1988. There he met Catherine and soon thereafter they married. They had two kids and they started to not get along. Partially, because Vikdahl, was getting into the New York City film life and Catherine could not handle all the hours being a filmmaker entails. So... She filed for divorce. She managed to get Vikdahl's hiney deported, but now the year was 1992 and Czech Republic was now a free nation. So Vikdahl had to make two separate trips to the US to finish his film. Now the dear Vikdahl resides in Prague with his lovely wife Gina, also an American and their three year old son.

I say all that to say this... if Catherine could "claim abuse" and get an innocent man deported, why the hell can't Bill blow the whistle on an abusive bitch and send her packing? Ay Veh! There seems to be no justice in this world.

California laws regarding joint custody are insane. It takes A LOT to separate a child from the mother, even if said mother is amazingly bad with the parenting skills. All Dad has to do is look at his wife funny and she can sue for solo custody. My heart goes out to the poor fathers out there who would make better parents but get screwed by a system that is just as sexist as any in America.