Go to Ask.com


enter the fray: our reader discussion forum
Search in:
Advanced
View:FlatThreaded
Female Scientists Dropping Out
by Slawrence5

When I reached my 40's and had paid off my mortgage, I suddenly started getting a lot of people trying to set me up. These opportunities were typically of two types. The first were women that needed a man to support them and their delinquent teenagers plus protect them from a possibly abusive ex. There were usually other issues as well.

The second type appeared to be never married but dejected with the career path that the women's movement had sold them on 20+ years ago. They had never made the effort to set their financial house in order (and in fact were in debt with few assets) but wanted a change and were looking for someone to assist in that.

I was suspicious of their motives and always felt that one could only have a successful union with someone who shared core values and these women had little in commen with me.

I'm sure that many men also get to that point in their careers but society doesn't provide them with on easy option.

This post doesn't comment specifically on the science employment sector but from my limited knowledge of it, I would assume that the long hours and long years of education, with little remuneration, have taken a toll and if they have an option to retire early, they will take it.

Re: Female Scientists Dropping Out
by StevieN
I agree. A clear and fair statement of reality.
Re: Female Scientists Dropping Out
by female_engineer

Because of the work of both women and men of earlier generations, both men and women have more choices (career, family, marital, life style).

Instead of men complaining that women have more “opt-out” options, and women crying that motherhood restricts career opportunities, why don’t both sexes just admit that you can’t have it all.

Make your choices and live with them. Get over it and grow up.

The Story of Gary
by pbev

I am in my forties, I work in a store. Every Saturday morning for over a year a guy used to come in at 6am when we opened. His name was Gary, he was in his late fifties, fit, pleasant and open. We'd talk about golf, classic cars, the Angels and what not.

One day Gary told me his house sounded like an airport. I asked why. Turns out an upstairs pipe broke, water ran for three hours while he was out and it flooded the den in his house. It ruined walls, made some damage, etc. His insurance covered it and the repair people had huge giant dryer blowers running and it was making quite a racket.

Oh really. Hmm. I went back to work and he walked off. I got to thinking. I wrote my number down on a piece of paper and handed it to him. I said, "If there is no one in your life who'd object, give me a call and we can go out for a coffee or something to get you out of your noisy house. Take it easy."

For God's sake. You think I'd have asked this guy what his pension plan was. He stopped coming into where I worked. When he finally did see me, he ran the other way. It took months before he'd say hi again.

Let me make one thing clear. I was not hitting on him. I only mentioned no one who'd object because if he were my guy, I wouldn't like him calling other women. I don't hit on married or gay guys so as far as I was concerned, this covered those bases too.

I am sharing this story for two reasons. One, sometimes it is just about having a coffee and two, if you're forever worried someone is trying to horn in on your life, tell your friends to stop setting you up.

Have a nice day.

Re: Female Scientists Dropping Out
by StevieN
F_E, I agree. People have a lot of choices; people are different. America offers more choice to more people than any place that every existed in history.
Re: Female Scientists Dropping Out
by kuruman
I agree with FE as well, except that you don't really hear men bitching about this...only women. The only men bitching about it are the ones in here (like myself) who are doing it to make a point.
Re: Female Scientists Dropping Out
by female_engineer

Kuruman,

I think it is generational - I hear it all the time at work from both sexes, most of whom are under the age of 35.

At least once a week, one of them tells me how "hard" they have it because they have kids and how "easy" it was for me 40 years ago, because I didn't have children.

LOL

Re: Female Scientists Dropping Out
by margaretnelsonwest

only federal emoyees have the option of retiring in their forties. State workers work until whenver they are retired usually without a pension since the budget etc rainy day fund no money etc however the real winner is the opec citizens that come here in the oil business and get retirement benifits like the average american federal scienists and go back home this is about 2 years worth of real work in real time. what a way to get fleeced at the pump oil that is texas tea

View as RSS news feed in XML