After 12 years of marrage you know who has the higher priority! Once the kids grow up find yourself a new "dog"!

Disagreement about pets can be a huge source of stress in the marriage because they ARE expensive and the very qualities that make dogs endearing to dog lovers (licking, requiring constant attention) make them ANNOYING to non-fans. My own marriage was sorely tested by a tankful of water turtles my husband and kids purchased while I was away for the weekend (We already had a dog and cat), so I know.

That said, if the LW allowed her husband to purchase a dog that requires regular grooming (a poodle or some fussy toy breed, for example), then that was stupid and she's stuck with it. If, however, they bought a low-maintenance breed which the husband insists on pampering (I have a wealthy extravagant friend who regularly pays for professional grooming for a labrador retriever -- ours enjoys a run in the hose), then she needs to stop writing letters and pitch a fit until he realizes that is an inappropriate expense.

Small dogs aren't particularly fussy. At least, they don't have to be. You can clip them yourself just like any other dog. Vets will express their anal glands(gross but necessary) and clip their nails on the cheap.

You can get a pair of dog clippers and bottles of good quality shampoo and conditioner for less than $60.

(Good shampoo+conditioner and blow drying minimize the wet dog smell)

You just made me appreciate my boxer even more. $60 for doggy shampoo and conditioner? My pup smells very nice after a warm bath with Johnson and Johnson No More Tears Baby Shampoo and some towel drying. My late, beloved lab mix also got washed with baby shampoo, as it is very gentle and non-irritating to the eyes. Of course, she took much much longer to dry and puffed up like a bear cub if you used a hair dryer.

and this is exactly why i am a cat person. indoor cats bath themselves, only need to get shots every couple of years, and are very good at reminding you when to do all the little stuff like cleaning the litter box or feeding them. plus, they smell nicer than dogs and pur when you pet them. and can entertain themselves relatively non-destructively when you're at work or out of the house.

as for the letter writer, i think she should tell her husband that if the dog deserves to have $60 grooming sessions, then so does she. find a good stylist, just get a nice layered cut without any color, and you're good to go for at least a couple of months. if you go to a decent place, they'll even give you the whole wash and style included (unlike, for instance, great clips, which charges individually for every service).

akzidenzgrotesk:

i think she should tell her husband that if the dog deserves to have $60 grooming sessions, then so does she.

I'm not sure she thinks she does, since she still seems to be stuck in "poverty mode." However, she may genuinely think that her family cannot afford that expense for herself, or that they can't afford it for both. She definitely needs to talk to her husband.

There are clipper options besides taking the dog in for nail trims. We've ordered one of those trimmer than actually sand the nails down, because if you cut a dog's nails the wrong way, he can literally bleed to death. If his hair is long, he may well need to get his fur trimmed regularly, and it's hard to find a decent groomer on the cheap. It's certainly not a job you can hand to young children, like you usually can with bathing a short-haired dog.

I hope you didn;t pay too much for the sander-type clippers! A plain old regular dremel, on low, is great on dog nails. The only catch is it takes a while and the pup doesn't like holding still that long, so it takes two of us - one to distract, one to dremel. I'm always worried about cutting the quik when I clip her nails, though, so the two person dremel thing is sometimes worth it.

//and this is exactly why i am a cat person. indoor cats bath themselves, only need to get shots every couple of years, and are very good at reminding you when to do all the little stuff like cleaning the litter box or feeding them. plus, they smell nicer than dogs and pur when you pet them. and can entertain themselves relatively non-destructively when you're at work or out of the house.//

But at the end of the day, they still shit in your house. And then walk on your kitchen counter. :)

I won't say anything about your own cats, but I have a lot of friends with cats, and oh yes they do fricking smell. My parents' house never smelled like dog when we had a cocker spaniel. And she thumped her leg when we petted her.

As for the beleaguered new pet owner, you shouldn't have gotten the dog if you're strapped for cash -- stuff really adds
up. I used to groom the cocker with clippers, though. We'd get her a "puppy cut" (one length) once a year and I would take over from there. It's not as hard as it sounds.

Besides grooming the dog, the a child, also needs to go to the Dr./Vet. I hope they don't neglect that aspect of pet care.

akzidenzgrotesk:

and this is exactly why i am a cat person.

And it all makes me glad I'm old and had dogs back in the day when you romped with your dog outside (remember outside?), thus never needing to get its toenails clipped, and you brushed and bathed your pup yourself. God almighty, can't people do ANYTHING for themselves any more? It's a dog, not a trophy wife or expensive crystal. Get out the hose and some baby shampoo. Sheesh.

Terrils:

akzidenzgrotesk:

and this is exactly why i am a cat person.

And it all makes me glad I'm old and had dogs back in the day when you romped with your dog outside (remember outside?), thus never needing to get its toenails clipped, and you brushed and bathed your pup yourself. God almighty, can't people do ANYTHING for themselves any more? It's a dog, not a trophy wife or expensive crystal. Get out the hose and some baby shampoo. Sheesh.

And they seem happier too.

No lie - one of my cats now has a dedicated washing bowl. He goes to the litter box and then goes to the bowl to wash his paws off :P He started that all on his own too.