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give her a break
by nursey

I think most parents who send their kids to to live at college have done almost as much as this mom has, i.e., make sure they have a place to live and food to eat. (Not applying for him) It almost seems that everyone who responded thinks you raise the kid 'till 18, then they are on their own. I thought most people hoped to be able to provide for their kids' college ed.; I know I do. For the record, I was pretty much on my own from 18, including getting myself enrolled in college and paying for it, and my apartment too. I wouldn't do everything the same as she did, but I do think she is moving in the right direction, and I'm sure by the time he graduates he will be on his own. Yes, he's lucky, as is every kid who has college paid for, but give the mom a break.

Re: give her a break
by Austin Annie

Actually, I think it's pretty unusual for a parent to set her child up all expenses paid for the child to attend community college--not in their own community but in one of the most expensive cities in the country--after the child fails out of university.

Re: give her a break
by afw
Agreed. He washed out of the university and so they are paying thousands for him to live in California and go to community college? Ridiculous. I finished my freshman year with something like a 2.0 GPA - pretty bad, but not enough to be put on academic probation. But I still took a semester off, lived at home and worked a full-time job (for minimum wage), realized how incredibly awful it is to work all week and have less than $175 to show for it, and then went back the following Spring. I averaged a 3.4 GPA the rest of my college career and still managed to graduate four years from starting.
Re: give her a break
by asmit4

So her son fails out of school in California and her response is to pay for him to attend community college in California along with a free apartment?

If this were my kid, I would have him attend community college at home for at least a semester, THEN we could discuss (upon his acheiving a 3.0 GPA) him moving back to California again. IMO- college education and apartments being paid for by parents have to be EARNED. If my kid isn't holding up their end of the bargain (a 3.0GPA min in my book) they don't deserve to have it paid for.

Re: give her a break
by janna1g

He failed out in Wisconsin. He wanted to go to California in the first place, and was told no. So now he is trying on the life he wants. I don't think I could swing his apartment rent and debit card, but I would support this attempt of his to launch. He went along with the Wisconsin idea, but it wasn't a good fit. Havent' any of you had a job that didn't work well for you?

It sounds like the writer is affluent enough to support this second attempt of her son's; I guess I don't get the vitriol. Some people, I guess, are just SO VIRTUOUS, they have never made a mistake, had a false start, or helped their kid and therefor are morally superior. Or something.

Re: give her a break
by Freki

I will give HIM a break. He is at least getting OK grades at his community college now, doing his own grocery shopping, and gently but firmly telling his mother she doesn't get to ride around in his pocket. He is still completely dependent on her, but seems to be slowly working towards adulthood. Some people take longer; he is giving it a second try; his mom is rich enough to afford this.

But the article made it pretty clear that if he ever gets out of his mom's wallet and makes it on his own as an adult, it will be over her protestations, and despite her best efforts to keep him helpless.

She gets no slack from me.

Freki

Re: give her a break
by CMS

janna1g ,

Actually, he wanted to go to a California school but didn't have much of a chance of getting in due to his DECISION to get bad grades in high school. And he still could have applied himself, but didn't bother.

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