In News, Post, Tribune, Chronicles, and Times today Sen. Obama shits and Sen. Clinton farted. No charges were issued... yet. While placing them under the Microscope, we also noticed one of Obama's nuts is a little lower than the other and Hillary's left breast is bigger.

Meanwhile, before touring Vietnam, Sen. McCain fell in love and married a model- because he likes pretty women. He went to war. In, 1967, He became a POW. Unfortunately, while away his beautiful wife suffered horrific scars from an automobile accident that left her slightly disfigured and with a bit more weight. This new, not as pretty, woman wasn't the trophy he remembered. Being a good Christian man, he began having affairs. Heading the Replacement Air Group 174 was a major position. He worked very hard to earn[but, I thought you said that position was controversial because many said it was favoritism, with his father being J. M. Sr. because he didn’t command a squadron first as is the protocol?!? SSSHHhhh , self]. Sometimes stress makes you want comfort. He sought so much comfort it earned him a reputation for banging his subordinates.

No, no, no we're not going to bring Bill into this. After all it's a bit irrelevant now, right? Ok. Now where was I? Oh yes, his 1974-1977 violations of the Uniform Code of Military Justice rules against adultery and fraternization with subordinates. So Pimp, I mean Sen. McCain left his executive position in Jacksonville to become the number-two man in the Navy's Senate liaison Washington, D.C. office. He took his work very seriously. That’s why he turned the office into a political hotspot where Bill Clintons, Kennedys, Lewinskys, Monroes, Client #9s, Girl 6s, Pots, and Kettles could meet up “platonically”(of course and shame on you for thinking otherwise) for drinks and unwind.

In 1979, while attending a military reception in Hawaii, he saw Cindy Hensley.
He was IMMEDIATEly smitten with her. She had everything he ever wanted in a woman:

1)Political ties
2)Money
3)Good Looks
4)Young
5)Passive

When he just "happened" to bump into her, he monopolized her time for the duration of the evening. No, he didn't spit game/manipulate her and appeal to her naivety... that's what pimps do to secure tricks.
In his own words, McCain described their first meeting, "She was lovely, intelligent and charming, 17 years my junior but poised and confident. I monopolized her attention the entire time, taking care to prevent anyone else from intruding on our conversation. When it came time to leave the party, I persuaded her to join me for drinks at the Royal Hawaiian Hotel. By the evening's end, I was in love."
Such an opportunist, I mean opportunity to fall in love. Who could resist? The courtship was hot and passionate and totally romantic. They looked so in love onlookers would gaze at them and smile… Except for Carol Shepp McCain, John's wife. He couldn’t believe her unhappiness. The idea of being shackled to a killjoy who was overweight and connectionless was too overwhelming for Sen. McCain. He divorced her in 1980 and married Ms. Hensley a month later.

Shortly after his marriage, his political career took off all the way to the banks where him and Four of his buddies celebrated his good fortune. Whatever happened to them, hmmm? In 1988/1989, Mrs. McCain began great charitable works volunteering at the local police dept. as a drug dog. She was later fired for stealing from her job... naturally; Mr. McCain fired the guy responsible for firing his wife. Well, it gets pretty intricate after that. The sham, I mean shame of the situation "forced" Cindy to a life of crime, I mean lying, I mean oh that is what I meant . Fortunately, she was able to recover because SHE Said She Did( and she’s totally trustworthy) Coincidentally, it also prevented the Phoenix New Times scoop about her situation. Cindy has always had the talent of killing two birds with one stone [see AVMT]. One must fill sorry for her as it was mostly a result of pain due to a spinal injury. Speaking of injuries, Cindy McCain suffered a massive stroke in 2004. Can you imagine the pain? As a result she suffers from short term memory loss. FDA just released information stating that short term memory loss is great if you’re married to a womanizer.

She has been mostly out of the limelight except when in February 2008, Lady McCain made news by being critical of Michelle Obama, the wife of Democratic Presidential candidate Barack Obama, who had said, "And let me tell you something: For the first time in my adult lifetime I am really proud of my country." McCain replied: "I am proud of my country. I don't know about you — if you heard those words earlier — I am very proud of my country."
This is understandable as her hurdles have always been self induced/afflicted with her being a Hensley in all. She was shocked that blackass Michelle hadn't always felt ecstatic about white America. She should be a proud American always as she could be walking around naked somewhere in Africa. How ungrateful. Tsk. Tsk Mrs. Obama.

Well, it's going to be an interesting race to the white house I tell ya. Yes sir, it is. I have to end this now. The radio just said Sen. Obama burped and Sen. Clinton hiccupped.

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And enlightening. I didn't recall all of that stuff about McSame. I knew about the Keating Five and how he divorced his first wife after her accident and his adultery. I didn't know much about Cindy.

I know we all have flaws. But is this the best the Party of Family can come up with?

consider a man's sex life relevant to his presidency. Cannot remember where I heard that mantra...

On Oct. 8, 1989, The Arizona Republic revealed that McCain's wife and her father had invested $359,100 in a Keating shopping center in April 1986, a year before McCain met with the regulators.

The paper also reported that the McCains, sometimes accompanied by their daughter and baby-sitter, had made at least nine trips at Keating's expense, sometimes aboard the American Continental jet. Three of the trips were made during vacations to Keating's opulent Bahamas retreat at Cat Cay.

McCain also did not pay Keating for some of the trips until years after they were taken, after he learned that Keating was in trouble over Lincoln. Total cost: $13,433.

When the story broke, McCain did nothing to help himself.

"You're a liar," McCain said when a Republic reporter asked him about the business relationship between his wife and Keating.

"That's the spouse's involvement, you idiot," McCain said later in the same conversation. "You do understand English, don't you?"

He also belittled reporters when they asked about his wife's ties to Keating.

"It's up to you to find that out, kids."

The paper ran the story.

In his 2002 book, McCain confesses to "ridiculously immature behavior" during that particular interview and adds that The Republic reporters' "persistence in questioning me about the matter provoked me to rage."

"I don't know how (The Republic journalists) would have reported the story had I been more civil and understanding or just more of a professional during the interview," McCain wrote.

At a news conference after the story ran, McCain was a changed man. He stood calmly for 90 minutes and answered every question.

On the shopping center, his defense was simple. The deal did not involve him. The shares in the shopping center had been bought by a partnership set up between McCain's wife and her father. (The couple also had a prenuptial agreement that separated Cindy McCain's finances and dealings from his.)

To say nothing of being intentionally cruel to the party of family values....

Wow all this dirt about McCain and all Hitlary did was Lie, Cheat and Steal. She has lied about her deeds so many times there is little need to document them all. When she was 27 and a lawyer working on watergate she stole evidence and then lied about having it thus preventing the introduction of said evidence. Additionally she was fired from her job as a watergate lawyer because of her lying and unethical conduct. However, the way you present it, compared to McCain, Hitlary is a saint who only wants a chance to lie as our president and steal once again from the White House. You have convinced me, I am immediately revoking my dinner invitation to McCain and removing him from my Christmas card list.

My point is to even things up.

You very rarely hear anything sordid regarding McCain.

Hillary nor Barack are perfect... but neither is McCain.

Of the three, his demons are worse to me. In viewing/ reading his biography I relate to him less.

Point Blank