Do not get any legal entity involved....you will regret it. The only exception is in cases of physical or sexual abuse.

Years ago, I was laid off from my job and had to relocate to look for another one, which I got within 6 months. My sister offered to let my daughter , who was 13 or 14 and beginning to be a real probelm, stay with her out of state and start the school year. Before I knew it, my sister sent me papers to sign giving her legal guardianship on the basis that I was an unfit parent (the year before I became clincally depressed , but got fine with theray and antidepressants). I refused to sign but my daughter ended up staying the entire school year and was more angry with me than ever when she did come home. A lot of therapy went on for her for the next couple of years.

To some extent, I felt a lot of guilt for ever letting her go to my sister's in the first place, untill years later, when our Dad died. My sister wanted to immediately put our Mom in a bad nursing home near where she lives, while I wanted to put her in a good one that specialized in Alzheimer's patients near where I lived. We fought, probably because it was the first time I really stood up to my sister. Our Mom got freaked out by the idea of any nursing home, so I left with my Mom and a few of her possessions and brought her home to live with me until her death a few months later. During this time, my sister tried to get legal guardianship of Mom based on my "instability". She was not successful. Apparently nobody but her thiinks I am unstable to the extent that the legal system had to get involved - on either occasion. I do not speak to my sister and have no plans to ever do so....so keep this in mind before you go to extremes with your own sister. Her life turned out differently than yours did, but you haven't walked in her shoes, and a lot of teenagers rebel and make mistakes before they straighten out - and they live in himes just like yours too.

Your letter upsets me greatly. The fact that your sister stole your child from you is unforgivable.

What gall to assume you can just swoop in and take someone's kids away. Most parent/child relationships are turbulent to some extent in the teen years. You don't just take someone's kids away because YOU don't agree with their lifestyle choices. If this beeyotch really wanted to help her sister, she would get her a$$ over to her house and babysit in the evening and try wield some positive influence in a less destructive way than breaking up a family.

I have a strong feeling this self righteous poser doesn't really want to help her sister----she wants to show her up so she can look like the hero/savior.

Lord, Jospry, would it kill you to come up with some new material? Cutting and pasting the exact same comment into multiple threads does nothing to further an intelligent discussion of the topic.

Please reread the note you responded to: it doesn't say the sister swooped in and took the child away. It seems the parented Agreed to this, maybe not the guardianship, but it is necessary for medical/school reasons, but can be temporary and should not have stated she was unfit. As a sister who took care of my sister's children, in two different situations, the key to success with this is not only agreement with the siblings, but with the children and families of both sides involved. it can be very beneficial to the parent and children. Communication, support and real caring and love is what is needed.

jospry probably responded several times because this response from Prudie makes one want to bang one's head on the wall. I feel a need to shout to the LW, "Stop!! Don't listen to this Prudie person! This is a horrible, misguided and doomed idea for all involved!" LW? Get a good therapist with whom to discuss how you can be helpful here without wantonly trampling real and necessary boundaries.
You may not take other people's children.
You should not manipulate situations that will further alienate anyone's affections in this family.

Please let's also remember that this is a teenage girl.

That happens to be a very volatile substance. Go softly,tentatively, respectfully, all.

Jospry is a troll.

The niece is drowning. A miscarriage, trouble with the law, threatening to drop out of school-- her mother can't or won't handle her.

Getting in a new environment under the care of a constant, watchful adult presence certainty can't hurt the girl more than she she is hurting herself now.