I'm an ambitious recent college graduate.
Congratulations! Now you can apply that ambition to learning how to succeed in a great career.
Unfortunately, your expectations of career life are at odds with reality. Two clues:
1) Your statement, "She's intelligent and distinguished, but she is also a perfectionist," uses the conjunction "but" incorrectly. The correct term here is "because."
2) Your question, "At what point can I turn to my boss and say, 'Hey, I need things to be different around here' without sounding like an ingrate for the great opportunity that I have," implies that such a point can be expected. It can't.
On the practical side, you've got to decide whether to stick it out, or give up and find a job with more praise and less perfectionism. If you find it, keep it a secret, because everyone will want one.
Meanwhile, when you start fuming, direct that frustration and anger at whoever trained you to expect lots of praise for simply adequate work. They did you a disservice.
I am a 26-year-old just out of college, and I recently started my first full-time position.
Congratulations! You have accomplished more than 85% of the people in the world, and have placed yourself in a position to manage your life, maintain a comfortable lifestyle, and eventually achieve self-actualization.
Regardless of the college education, however, you are 26 years old. This means that your parents no longer provide for you. You and they are on equal terms when it comes to financial responsibility: each pays his own bills. Eventually they may come to depend on you, but that's a long way down the road.
Practically speaking, you need to realize that paying off your loans actually does help you save. By setting aside $250 a month (or whatever you can) to pay off the loan, you are establishing a pattern that will turn into savings once the loan is paid off. If you can possibly double your payment each month, do that before you rent a bigger apartment, buy a new car, go on a big vacation, have a child, get married, or any other costly things. Those things can wait until the debt is gone.
Just keep putting that money aside, and watch the debt turn into savings before you know it.
I have been dating a wonderful young woman for over a year.
Congratulations! Unfortuanately, we all know where this is headed. No one writes in just to brag.
Now that you know your fiancées fatal flaw (cue the glass shattering), and have assessed her willingness and ability to correct it, you have asked for help in how to deal with it. Apparently you have already decided that dealing is the correct choice; cutting and running is not on the table.
By now, having figured out this quirk, you must have some other knowledge of your true love's personality. Does she do this to everyone, or just you? She may have a problem accepting anyone else's point of view at face value, or she may just be a lousy conversationalist with nothing else to say. Sometimes "witty" means "snarky" and "bitter."
What kind of feedback does she respond to? Do you need to blow up at her in order to make an impression that yes, this really is a problem? Will sarcastic rejoinders, or public humiliation, help it sink in? If nothing will change her behavior, then you can only change your reaction to it. Laugh it off, or confront it head-on, whichever makes you feel better. Use different responses on different days, if that's what you feel like. Essentially you need to take Prudie's first option and recognize that these slights have nothing to do with your correctness or worth as a person.
I strongly suggest, though, that you start "dealing" right now, and make sure that whatever method you like actually works - as in, makes you feel better - before you go through with the ceremony. Otherwise, it's time to revisit that decision about cutting and running.
I recently had breast-enhancement surgery, and there is a noticeable difference.
Congratulations! Success!
You might ask yourself how you imagined people would respond before you made this investment. Folks who get dentures do so in order to not be noticed, so they expect no comments, except maybe, "What a pretty smile."
The answer of how to respond is directly related to how you feel. If you feel creepily intruded upon, then react accordingly: "I can't believe you just said that." If you feel flattered, then flirt away. In both cases, you can try to act surprised, but it won't really work.
