1) No Recognition For Work Well...... Done.

This guy is a prime example of the negative effects of this “self esteem at all costs” upbringing that has become so popular. He grows up thinking that he should get a gold star just for showing up. He gets out into the real world and can’t believe that people don’t praise him for actually doing what he was hired for. He also can’t understand why his boss doesn’t like it when he doesn’t do exactly that. This is especially true in the cutthroat business of legal practice (in DC no less).

Welcome to reality! You know, the land where we only get recognized for going above and beyond the call of duty (if we even get recognition at all). A person really can’t expect praise for a job done. It has to be done well. The only way that you can get around it is to go into politics where reality doesn’t really apply (I guess he is in the right place for that).

Video) Long Distance Teen Love:

At fifteen years old, all love is true love. She should just enjoy the relationship the way it is. She just needs to remember that a relationship over the phone is completely different from one in person. The imagination tends to idealize the way we view someone that we can’t see. She can’t use this as a substitute for “real” friends that she can actually spend time with.

2) Still Not a Grown Up:

She is 26 years old. How old does a person have to be before they actually have to stand up on their own? It used to be 18, but now it has been extended until they finish college. This girl wants to take it even beyond that. I guess her parents may have been a little “too supportive” (pun intended) like the first LW. Now they have raised a selfish brat who “realizes” her parents are poor, but really doesn’t care because it’s all about her.

I had to work a full time job just to put myself through college. I applied for all the scholarships and financial aid I qualified for and worked my butt off to make sure I qualified for as much as possible. I understood that my parents could not afford to help me financially, but they did everything they could. I never “expect” anyone to help, but I am extremely grateful when someone does.

A little hard work was good for me. During the times that I struggled, I learned to appreciate the things my parents did do for me. The sense of entitlement that I see in kids today makes me sick. There are too many whiny, lazy, people who hold out their hands and expect someone else to fill them.

3) Nasty (but not in a good way) Fiancée:

There are two possibilities that this guy is looking at. Either she has a self-esteem issue, or she is just an arguer. He should definitely try talking to her about how he feels when she treats him like that. She may not even realize that she is doing it. She may or may not change, but he can cross that bridge when it comes.

I have had several friends that had a constant need to one-up everyone (I find that I do it myself sometimes when I need an ego boost). I usually let them be, but I will call them on it (usually laughing) if they take it too far. That way, they know I won’t put up with it, and the laugh kind of disarms them a little. If they keep it up, the laughter stops and I tell them to “chill out”. Doing this with the “parent voice” usually works best.

The arguer is a whole other kind of animal. My dad is like this with his sister. He purposely takes the opposite side of any conversation so that they can spar. She ends up getting pissed off, and he can never seem to understand because he was just “having fun”. My dad has been like this his whole life, so I don’t know if it is something you can change in this situation.

4) Everyone Noticed:

She got new bigger boobs. Now she is mad because everyone seems to notice? That kind of defies logic to me. I would think she would be more pissed off if nobody noticed.

Unless this was to fix a mastectomy or something like that, she got the breasts to be noticed more. She put them out there, and now she doesn’t like it. It sounds like she didn’t think this through as well as she thought.

They were supposed to make her feel more confident and better about herself. It turns out that they aren’t the little miracle self-esteem boosters she was hoping for. The quick fix isn’t usually the best solution. She is still the same old sad person, but now nobody can see past her.

I read this week's column and just had to sign up to comment! I cannot believe the sense of entitlement running through our society. My job affords me the opportunity to see how parents deal with their children financially and I cannot believe the number of people who think their kids should get a free college education. A college education is a privilege. As difficult as it is, student loans are designed to let you get a job before paying them back. You can get a job out of high school. If you want something more, you have to earn it. And what's the point of doing all this crap to build children's self-esteem if they are still going to rely on others for their approval? It is SELF esteem, is it not? I work hard every day and go home with the satisfaction that I did my job well. Not because someone told me I did but because I was there and saw it! In fact, if my esteem rested on my boss, I would probably be institutionalized by now.

As for the fiance, it sounds like he would like her to give him the last word for once. Debates where couples disagree can be stressful but it's how the couple deals with it that determines their staying power. At some point, someone has to say, let's just agree to disagree AND the other person has to learn to accept that.

If the ladies with the new breasts had gotten a hair cut and no one noticed, would she be happy? If you change your appearance, you generally do it for people to notice. How do you know if they noticed unless they say something? On the other hand, if it really is obvious, she should probably look at them and say "duh." Who has the audacity to discuss someone's private parts at work? Do they walk around saying "Hey, your butt looks nice in those pants?" I doubt it.

I think I am still right on the solution of talking to her.

Jaymz the Pooh:

3) Nasty (but not in a good way) Fiancée:

There are two possibilities that this guy is looking at. Either she has a self-esteem issue, or she is just an arguer. He should definitely try talking to her about how he feels when she treats him like that. She may not even realize that she is doing it. She may or may not change, but he can cross that bridge when it comes.

If I had used my brain at all on this, I would have said that it was her passive-agressive way of telling him she is not happy with him (I guess that's what happens when I do these on my lunch break). Maybe he has been doing something to belittle her in some way. Maybe she is just like the overeducated Fray poster last week who asked about her "not-as-intelligent, lower class" boyfriend. He could guess about her motivation for days, but the only way to know for sure is through good solid communication.

I had intended to mention the haircut analogy in my original post. That is just too funny that it got attached by someone else.

I have heard these same kind of complaints from women who wear short, tight skirts and low-cut blouses that show way too much cleavage for anything outside a singles bar (or street corner). They say guys are always staring at the parts they have worked so hard to accentuate, and they want to be taken seriously.

I am thinking that she may even be complaining as another way of drawing more attention to herself. This is kind of like the obviously gorgeous and skinny girl that says "I'm so fat!" to the less beautiful (in her eyes) and slightly overweight girls she likes to surround herself with (Watch how offended people like that get if you agree with them!).

Ha! So funny and so true! Now not only can she get nonverbal attention with people oogling, but she can whine and complain about it to all her friends and acquaintances and end up talking about herself for hours!

Its brilliant! BRILLIANT, I tell you!!!

LOL. Stupid b.... I know that's harsh, but as female, girls like this make us all look bad. Get a counselor. Geez. I feel guilty posting responses cause she's probably reading them thinking, "Look at all the people thinking about ME!! OMG, I'm soooo popular!

She's so vain....

She probably thinks this post is about her.

:D