Odd. I read discriminatemuch to mean that it would be doubly the LW's fault if she had an affair. First, for deciding to cheat in the first place, but second for marrying a man with whom she's currently unhappy (and thus leaving herself more open to the temptation of straying).

Either way, this LW needs to figure out if her guy is showing his affection, just in nontraditional ways, and if that's a dealbreaker. Of course, if he really doesn't care, she should dump his sorry ass already, which is probably what he's going for with his passive-aggressive behavior anyway.

(I know a couple much like this. Unfortunately, he was too passive to leave when his bad behavior couldn't push her away. They're getting married at her insistance, and heaven help their kids. It'll be a real live version of the Bennet family from Pride and Prejudice. Ugh.)