When I married my husband, we were both advised by a Pastor friend of ours "to leave behind all of those we dated, especially if we slept with them." He advised us that when we enter into the covenant of marriage we are entering it with God. The first commandment says "Thou shall put no other Gods before Me." The Pastor friend said, 'if you love God, and you put NO OTHER God before Him, then you should love your spouse as you love God, and put NO OTHER before him or her."

The wife in the letter is allowing an ex boyfriend, who she may or may not have already slept with, or had sex with, but found him unattractive for whatever reasons, to be an ongoing part of her life. She is giving the ex hope. By accepting this "gift" from the ex she is showing her husband that he cannot provide for her. Marriage is difficult enough without more difficulties brought in by a new or better gift bought by a former love interest. There are many, many people who can fix a broken computer without having to go to a former love interest to fix it. A message to the husand: Husband, you need to step up, demand the computer be taken back, and demand that she stop playing with this mans heart. If she isn't finished with him, then she needs to leave the marriage because she is highly capable as any uncomitted person to commit adultery. You are very valuable, your feelings do matter, don't let her do this to you. If your ex girlfriend bought you an expensive gift, would your wife appeciate it? Would she appreciate you telling her, "oh, she wasn't that attractive... but this platinum watch is a keeper. What does she value? Because where her treasure is, that is where her heart will be also. Is she really over this man? Actions speak louder than words, and why is she (a married woman) alone with a single man? Is he that foolish? I wish you the best.