MLibby,

I think I am your age or just a little older. And I would have absolutely thought that someone saying, "Oh well my husband can take care of me," even as a teen, was an airhead. Even at 13, I could see so many things wrong with that statement, without even going into feminism. Who says you'll have a husband? Who says he can/will "take care of" you?

Neither of my grandmothers was political, and neither would have probably called themselves feminist. However, both lived through the Depression and World War II, and worked several jobs because their families needed the money. Regardless of what anyone may want, husbands literally cannot always "provide" for wives. At 13, this would have been 100% obvious to me, and should have been to you, too. I know that's a harsh thing to say, but there you go. Thirteen is old enough to know these things.

My own mother hasn't had a "career" that was some higher calling for her. She's had clerical and administrative jobs. I know that she often would have been glad to have a man earning enough provide for her and us kids. Thankfully, she kept her job. In the 1990s, my father's wages declined (like those of many blue-collar men) and, in this recession, he became unemployed in at 62. She's now supporting him.

This situation is not uncommon. In the last year, unemployment among men has gone up faster than unemployment among women. Thank goodness for these men (and any family dependents) that their wives have marketable job skills.

While there are some men out there who want a traditional wife, I think the balance has tipped such that most don't. (Of course, there are also men who want a wife to earn money, but maintain other sexist ideas.) If they don't appreciate the woman's professional identity, then they at least prefer some kind of earning potential.

Are you sure that your idea of being "provided for" isn't just a fantasy because you're tired of your job? I think I"m trying to say that you're talking about a situation that's very hypothetical, especially in this economy.

Finally, one last point: I think that women who don't want to be feminists should simply call themselves traditionalists. They should pick. You either accept tradtional roles as benign, or you don't.