"there is more to sex than the outcome"

FOR YOU. Yes, he should be going down on you. But you should realize that men are happy when we get laid.. and that's it. There is nothing more than the outcome for men. That doesn't make us bad people -- but just because there's more FOR YOU doesn't make the requirement for men any less important.

"Where is the desire to create a great scenario for both partners"

I agree completely. Where's your willingness to have lots of sex with your man?

To be clear: Yes, he should do more for you. But never for one second lose any degree of awareness that the "more" is ONLY FOR YOU - and not "both of you." Women don't function the same as men - and that works both ways.