Meghan, first, please accept my condolences. It is so unfair to lose a mother when you and she are both relatively young.

Thank you for writing about your pain. It's true, grief is not a polite subject in our society. While it once may have been overdone, today, grieving seems to be more obscene than most of the things the Supreme Court would recognize as pornographic.

And I hope you are finding some support, beyond your family. Please search for competent grief counselors. I worry, seven years after the fact, for my sons who were teenagers when their father died suddenly. They shied away from counseling, but I think as a result they never got the chance to complete the grieving process.

It doesn't go away, but it does find its way in your life. The sudden searing loss becomes less frequent. The best advice I ever got was that, if I felt like crying, even there in the street, I should let myself cry. That same societal numbness keeps everyone's eyes off you, and at least you don't have to twist the knife inside yourself.

People will want to comfort you, and to help you. It may be hard to accept these offers, but please, unless it's something that makes you terribly uncomfortable, accept them. It's what they have to offer, and it's slowly knitting you back into the world. I still regret that my youngest never found to time to take a flight in a small plane with a friend of mine.

Finally, be kind to yourself. You are a fine writer, and sound like a thoughtful and observant person. Give yourself grace.