Sorry, Emily, but you wrote that you knew this was coming: you were asked for help, not for your personal perspective on what *should* constitute a good time (that's a matter of taste, is it not?).

Here's how it works: some young folks like to go out and get dangerously drunk with each other. Since this is dangerous, they do it in groups and expect their friends to look out for one another so that they don't get Natalie Holloway'ed (among other sad possibilities). You don't have to like it, Emily, but you were not asked whether you did.

You *were* asked if the writer should put this issue aside and forgive her roommate. The answer is 'yes': the pair of them planned a vacation, the roomie was planning on having the author there to help watch her back, and the roomie felt betrayed (and possibly frightened?) that the author wasn't there for her. I sympathize with the author's reasons for backing out--pain is tough to bear--but her roomie's reasons for being upset were also legitimate. The author should try to forgive *and* be pleased that she got forgiven in the first place.