1) Lexington cigarettes. Look exactly like a pack of Winstons but taste like dried seal dung.

2) The Howling 7. Worst thing I've ever seen. Well, actually, it was so bad it was good, along the lines of Plan 9 From Outer Space with mutant werewolves instead of mutant space zombies.

3) Mr. Natural from Zap Comix. Ok, he wasn't actually super, but he was pretty cool. 'I take no gruff when I strut my stuff'.

4) David Hasselhoff pictures. I have over 250 of them on my laptop. Some in various stages of undress. One naked with two Sharpei puppies (don't ask). One dressed in pjs and bear-claw slippers pretending to open a Xmas present. He never met a camera he didn't like.

5) I'd boil up the chicken and veggies and feed it to the dog. Then either order pizza in or go find some deep fried soft-shell crabs and hushpuppies. Chicken. Ick.

6) Same job with same company, 4 cities and 2 countries in the last 3 years. I am so, like, totally DONE with moving house. Getting ready to change countries again, but only for a few months.

7) Never done one. It isn't some gay thing I'm not aware of, is it?

8) Don't know Boulder, but in Sarasota you could tell them their grey-water irrigation system is actually thinning pelican egg shells because they secretly use Herbal Essence shampoo.

9) Xingu black beer from Brazil. Lovely stuff. Wait a minute, I don't feel quilty at all! It must be because I've finally said it! Yes! I drink black beer! Ha Ha Ha Ha, I'm free! Free, I tell you !

10) Either the brass singing bowl from Tibet or the batik hanging from Zimbabwe. Back when you could actually go to that poor, benighted land. Down with Mugabe! Down with ZANU-PF!