"any lover who refers to the bed in which his beloved sleeps every morning as "my bed" maybe writes his own ticket to BreakUpsVille."

Hello w&c -

Our hero confesses to running around at night on the other side of the island where the stars are (Paris Hilton?), to failing to take a swim with his ex, and to sole ownership of the bed. And he compares his beloved to an antelope. Instead of flying too close to the sun, I believe he flew too close to stupid.

Enjoy the holiday weekend.