IncogNeato:

Sandstormz60:

If you go back and read the letter see where the LW says after the boss gets so hypercritical it stresses out the employee and she does poorly.

I usually err on the side of believing everything the LWs say, but not this time. I've met too many people who thought that a boss saying, "Get back to work" was "yelling." Any criticism whatever of this type of people, and they think someone's "making a federal case of it."

Odds are, he simply corrected her. She didn't like it, ignored it, forgot it, or argued about why her way was better. After the 3rd or 4th time he mentioned the same thing, he probably let some frustration out in his voice.

Too many people - and they have usually been under the age of 25, even 20 years ago - seem to think they can do no wrong, and that everyone should tell them how great they are at every opportunity. I remember my own period of thinking the world "owed" me for my perceived superior mental prowess (and total lack of experience, of course!) Most people outgrow it, if they don't establish a pattern of running every time the kitchen gets a little too warm.

There was another frayster who said that the LW likely had a genuine bad boss on her hands, due to the fact that she asked for help in coping, not for help in "changing" the boss. I might also point out that a boss doesn't have to be verbally abusive to be difficult to work with. Other methods of being a pill include taking all the credit and none of the blame, giving long-winded lectures in which the same point is repeated over and over and over (and continuing even after the other person says "I understand, I get it) talking like a know-it-all on a subject you know little about, incessant "did you do this, did you do that" nagging that makes the target feel like they're two years old, always criticizing but never praising, and the list goes on.

Now, its true that people in positions of authority (as well as people in general) tend to lapse into these types of behaviors from time to time, but I think its a good idea to check yourself from time to time and ask "Do I treat people with respect and dignity, or merely as problems that need to be solved?" Those who don't do this risk being labeled "bad bosses" even though they're not completely, obviously psycho.