I would mark your composition an unqualified A were it not for bits and pieces which need editing.

An editor can be a writers best friend, as I've mentioned to Jack Dallas, referencing his Civil War series, suggesting editorial oversight.

Even as a freshman college student, I marked and edited compositions from all levels, including post-grads (many of whom were smart but minimally literate, like daveto) so that the prof and our select group could get to the pub sooner. I have some expertise and innate facility.

Good stuff, zuko. Trite, cliched ending and a few quibbles in main text, but in the Fray-world it deserves pure thumbs-up.