1.You always wanted to see an African country like Zimbabwe....but couldn't afford to go......now Zimbabwe will come to you.

2. As a big fan of the TV show ...the Jeffersons....you always wondered....what would it be like if George and Weezie actually did make it to the White House.

3. You always did want to see a president wear a Nehru jacket and grow a fro......like the black guy from Mod Squad.

4. You always thought it was a damn shame.......that Soul Train never got to broadcast from the Oval Office.

5. You're tired of first daughters with names like Jenna and Barbara...........let's go with Starkeisha and Zanobia!

6. You've always wanted to see the president and first lady sing a SuperFreak duet on Halloween....with the president dressed like Rick James and Michelle in a leather micro-mini.(actually.......I'd like to see that.....that might even swing my abstention into a vote)

7. You've always thought.......Al Sharpton is a sharp guy with that Planet of the Apes hairdo.....and should get more involved in White House affairs.

8. Why should Atlanta just get the Freaknik...........let's turn the whole damn country into a big Freaknik!

9. You always wondered...........wouldn't it be great if the Castro brothers actually showed up at a presidential inauguration.

10. You always thought.......Ben Franklin and that bald head look out of place on the $100 bill.....wouldn't Muhammad Ali sticking the jab look a whole lot better?