Thanks for the poem, p. I agree with those who regard someone who smokes pot as not being sober, not in the sense those of ;us in 12 step groups mean it. Drugs and alcohol have to be abstained from if the drunks is to get their life back together; the general thinking is that if one develops an addiction to alcohol , they've also developed an addiction to all other mood altering chemicals, since all effect the same brain chemistry. Once one crosses the line, there are no alternative ways of copping a buzz, there is no reset button. The best book on the subject of alcoholism I've read is Under the Influence by James Milam, a very readable survey that considers the condition from the medical perspective, and it considers treatment modalities.