BenjaminAndrewMoore:

You want to sleep around on your other half? Ask him or her if it's okay with them. If it's not? Break up with them and do what you gotta do.

Well, at least you've acknowleged that it's not mandatory to stay in the relationship. That seems to be an unspoken expectation if you're a woman. Yes, your needs may be being ignored by your partner/husband, but it's up to you to make it work. I've lived that with a former partner, and the pressure that it's your job as a woman to fix your relationship is intense and feels unrelenting.

I understand to the point you're making about making a choice to be noble or not by being honest about what is happening to you and what your needs are. Truly it is one of the hardest lessons in life to first come to the realization that your needs aren't being met and things are not going to improve, and then finding the courage to say "I am justified in wanting to leave the relationship for this reason- it is not a trifling thing or a personal failure." Actually telling your partner, who you've loved for a long time and probably still love in many ways takes a great deal of courage. Cheating is much easier. It's definitely abdicating a responsibility and behaving in an emotionally immature way. It's an escape hatch from the reality of a no longer passionate relationship. I think that women that can take the high road and be honest about their sexual needs can do a lot to shift the double standards that we still hold, but it'll take noble, honest, mature and accountable women to do so.

If couples can stay together by taking 'seperate vacations' so to speak, where the implications of that are acknowleged with a nod, or can openly deal with their spouse/partner having another sexual partner from time to time- I say all power to them. But both parties definitely need to be on board.