Prudie, you are absolutely correct in your advice to the woman whose boyfriend insisted on knowing every detail of her sexual past- except the part about the restraining order. If a person is going to be violent, a piece of paper won't stop him or her, and may in fact give the holder a false sense of security. I strongly recommend that EVERYone read Gavin deBecker's excellent book "THE GIFT OF FEAR." I have bought numerous copies for my friends and think it should be required reading for every girl before she starts dating. It is about listening to your intuition, seeing the "red flags" before it is too late, and literally saving your own life. The woman who wrote to you must read it, because she is indeed in danger from her boyfriend.