I think the concept, you're describing is just too extreme and abstract for the problem. The problem itself is really likely more about dramatics than a real "problem. " On those days in my life, that I was eating ketchup and Ramen noodles myself, I would have been damn happy to get any kind of milk and another bottle of ketchup. Grateful, in fact. There's something about putting water in your milk that would be applicable here too.

I think it's a matter of degree, no? If we tell someone in Myanmar this morning they should be grateful to get 6 oz of water or folks in Darfur that 20 oz of cornmeal and a 1/1/2 cup of lentils will be their diet indefinately, I see your point. My sister, unasked, bails my ass out of the food bank. Grateful. And considering the kismet that puts me behind this computer and some other person in line at the Red Cross, I can live with being grateful.

Circling back to LW, myself....Like I said, My parents we funny talking, distinctly unfashionable, over eager to engage with my friends and their parents. Are they bad parents? Are poor parents who live in mobile homes bad parents? Are parents with lawn gnomes bad parents? Are parents who show some affection to each other bad parents? Or, most breathtaking in your example now this young person is a victim of parents who might have put him in a good school, have a nice home and drive him around inspite of his lack of appreciation for what they must think is his own good.

When an incipient adult and parents disagree on what "their own good" is, that is what sets the stage for launching an independant adult into the world. It's nature. Also, without developing some social skills, there is no social life.