...they'd campaign cleaner than the Clintonian machine. I know this farce may be funny to some...but really. How about something more original...maybe the headline:

"Hillary Sells Soul to Devil for 10 million More $!"

or

"Obama Premortem Canonization by Vatican!"

or

" The Republican Attack Machine Creates Toxic Waste...Ruled Unhealthy by EPA"

or even...

"Anne Coulter as McCain's Veep!"

These are much funnier headlines! Or wait...are they really true? :)